God Will Bless Those Who Wait

College Life and the Real World

2010-12-20T21:16:00.000-08:00

Wow. I can't believe that it's been a month. The past month has had its ups and downs. On the brighter side, I finished/passed/survived my first semester at college!

With college comes a whole new set of temptations. Pretty girls and handsome guys who just seem so charming and nice. "Sure they're not Christians, but is it that big of a deal?" Simply put, it is.

II Corinthians 6:14 says, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"

There are several problems that come with dating or courting an unbeliever.

1) They may cause you to lose your purity.
People that aren't saved don't see the problem with having physical relationships outside of marriage. I Corinthians 6:18 says, "Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body."

2) They may cause you to leave church.
Someone who is not saved will not necessarily respect your Sunday commitment to church. Instead, they may want to go on a date, watch football, or do something else. Once you start skipping church, it's not too long before it becomes a habit. Hebrews 10:25 says, "Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching."

3) They WILL cause division on how to raise your children.
Since the eventual result of dating/courting SHOULD be marriage, and the eventual result of marriage is usually children, you will run into more problems here. An unsaved spouse will not see the benefit/necessity of things like family devotions, discipline, Christian education, and Sunday School. Proverbs 22:6 says,"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." If a child does not have a proper Christian home, then they are much less likely to be close to God when they are older.

There are no benefits to marrying someone who is not saved, only heartaches. Besides, an unsaved person lacks the qualities that we should be looking for in a future spouse. Qualities like a good relationship with God, a strong testimony, and a burden for souls.

Do your future a favour- don't even romantically consider someone that is not saved.

-Glen

p.s. Merry Christmas!

Guest Post: 7 Myths of Single Life

2010-11-20T17:46:00.000-08:00

By Cary Schmidt

Seven Myths of Single-Life

Myths abound in today’s culture—through urban legends, chain emails, speed-diets, and beyond! Thanks to snopes.com, it’s pretty easy to run an email, a story, or a bizarre event through a quick research test to find out if it’s true or not.

So—do you have a “snopes” for life? Has it occurred to you that life also has its myths and “urban legends.” The issue is, these myths have much greater consequences. And much like “snopes” we need to take the philosophies, assumptions, and teachings of our pop-culture and run them through the truth test—the Bible.

Here are seven popular myths of single-life—seven lies that many singles buy into. Let’s run them through the truth test and unmask them as frauds:

1. Happiness and love is found in a person and I must find that person. Many people fall for this lie. Their lives become an endless search for the right person to completely bring happiness to life. The problem is—no human being can fulfill the deepest desires of our hearts. That is reserved for God alone, through Jesus Christ. Psalm 16:11 teaches, “Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy;”

2. Freedom is about making decisions alone and doing my own thing—”I gotta be me…” This is a gross distortion of a biblical truth. Yes, God created you as an individual with many unique qualities—so in that sense, you do have to be you. But, God never intended for you to live independent of Him or outside of His purpose or structure for life. The greatest life is found when you are who God truly made you to be. In John 10:10 Jesus said, ” I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”

3. There is a short-cut to success and fulfillment in life and I will find it. Many believe that there are quick ways to happiness and fulfillment in life, and so they fall for them—parties, illicit sex, drinking, drugs, etc. We all tend to want the path of least resistance and the quickest path to success. In truth, the best life is built one decision at a time on the strong foundation of biblical values and principle.

God taught in Joshua 1:8, that true success is a product of biblical principles in practice. Joshua 1:8″ This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.”

4. Responsibility and purpose in life can be indefinitely postponed. In the short term, a life free of responsibility and commitment seems like the way to go—but in the long term, it’s disastrous. We were designed by our Creator to have purpose, to embrace commitments, and to shoulder responsibilities that honor Him. God teaches that life comes with built in accountability and responsibility. Those who embrace this, always win. Romans 14:12, “So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.”

5. Love is a mystical, magical, fleeting thing that has something to do with sex. God is love and God created sex, so who could possibly instruct us in this matter better than Him. Quite simply, true love is a choice, not an emotion. You do it, you don’t feel it. Warm and fuzzy emotions, as enjoyable as they are, are not and never will be love. And sex is only an expression of love when it’s done God’s way—within a committed marriage for life. Outside of that boundary, sex is harmful in every way to both parties. It does irreparable spiritual harm.

Here’s how God says it: 1 Corinthians 6:18, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.”

6. As long as I’m not hurting anyone else, what I do doesn’t matter. This sounds great and becomes a great excuse for someone who purely lives for self. The problem is, it’s simply not true. No man is an island. We all influence somebody. We all have people in the future we will influence. And every decision you make today is countless repercussions for people around you and people in your future that you haven’t even met yet—like your kids! Think of it this way—have you become the bearer of some of your parents bad decisions? Probably so. And at the time, they too were thinking their decisions wouldn’t hurt anyone. But you know differently.

God commands us to live as examples to others, positively influencing them for right. 1 Timothy 4:12, “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”

7. Pleasure, possessions, and personal pursuits can ultimately fill the longing of my heart. God created pleasure. God gives us possessions. And God calls us to purposeful pursuits. But He is the source and the giver. When we forsake following God and pursue these other things, life begins to fall apart. Apart from God, More stuff merely means more problems! We’re called to worship God and use things. But so often we get it backwards. We worship things and use God.

1 Timothy 6:17, “Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;”

Are you falling for some of these myths? Begin today to align your life with God’s principles—beginning with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You can read more about having that relationship in another article in this magazine.

Build your life and future upon truth, not upon the myth and urban legends of popular philosophy. Opinions of men will fail, but God’s Word is always true!

Here are seven popular myths of single-life—seven lies that many singles buy into. Let’s run them through the truth test and unmask them as frauds:

1. Happiness and love is found in a person, and I must find that person. Many people fall for this lie. Their lives become an endless search for the right person who will completely bring happiness to life. The problem is—no human being can fulfill the deepest desires of our hearts. That is reserved for God alone, through Jesus Christ. Psalm 16:11 teaches,“Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy;”

2. Freedom is about making decisions alone and doing my own thing—”I gotta be me…” This is a gross distortion of a biblical truth. Yes, God created you as an individual with many unique qualities—so in that sense, you do have to be you. But, God never intended for you to live independent of Him or outside of His purpose or structure for life. The greatest life is found when you are who God truly made you to be. In John 10:10 Jesus said, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”

3. There is a shortcut to success and fulfillment in life, and I will find it. Many believe there are quick ways to happiness and fulfillment in life, and so they fall for them—parties, illicit sex, drinking, drugs, etc. We all tend to want the path of least resistance and the quickest path to success. In truth, the best life is built patiently, one decision at a time, on the strong foundation of biblical values and principles. This takes years—not weeks or months.

God taught in Joshua 1:8 that true success is a product of biblical principles in practice: “This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.”

4. Responsibility and purpose in life can be indefinitely postponed. In the short term, a life free of responsibility and commitment seems like the way to go—but in the long term, it’sdisastrous. We were designed by our Creator to have purpose, to embrace commitments, and to shoulder responsibilities that honor Him. God teaches that life comes with built-in accountability and responsibility. Those who embrace this, always win. Romans 14:12, “So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.”

5. Love is a mystical, magical, fleeting thing that has something to do with sex. God is love, and God created sex, so who could possibly instruct us in this matter better than Him. Quite simply, true love is a choice, not an emotion. You do it, you don’t feel it. Warm and fuzzy emotions, as enjoyable as they are, are not and never will be love. And sex is only an expression of love when it’s done God’s way—within a committed marriage for life. Outside of that boundary, sex is harmful in every way to both parties. It does irreparable spiritual harm.

Here’s how God says it: 1 Corinthians 6:18, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.”

6. As long as I’m not hurting anyone else, what I do doesn’t matter. This sounds great and becomes an easy excuse for someone who purely lives for self. The problem is, it’s simply not true. No man is an island. We all influence somebody. We all have people in our future whom we will one day influence. And every decision you make today has countless repercussions in people’s lives for years to come—like your kids! Think of it this way—have you become the bearer of the bad decisions of others? Probably so. And at the time, they too were thinking their decisions wouldn’t hurt anyone. But you know differently.

God commands us to live as examples to others, positively influencing them for right. 1 Timothy 4:12, “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”

7. Pleasure, possessions, and personal pursuits can ultimately fill the longing of my heart. God created pleasure. God gives us possessions. And God calls us to purposeful pursuits. But He is the source and the giver. When we forsake following God and pursue these other things, life begins to fall apart. Apart from God, more stuff merely means more problems! We’re called to worship God and use things. But so often we get it backwards. We worship things and use God.

1 Timothy 6:17, “Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;”

Are you falling for some of these myths? Begin today aligning your life with God’s principles—beginning with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You can read more about starting that relationship by clicking here .

Build your life and future upon truth, not upon the myth and urban legends of popular philosophy. Opinions of men will fail, but God’s Word is always true!

I'm Sorry

2010-11-06T22:33:00.000-07:00

It's not about lack of commitment, it's about lack of time. Between college, church, work helping in our Christian school, and life in general, I have been CRAZY busy. Please bear with me. I have some ideas for posts that I just have to finalize and they should be good to go.

Part of the reason that I have been so busy is that I have been working on a missions project. Our youth group is planning to enter a 100-mile ultra marathon in May of 2011, raising funds for a missionary in Haiti. There are eight of us, and our goal is to raise $100,000, so you can see where the busy comes in. Our blog for that is 100milesformissions.blogspot.com

I haven't forgotten about you guys, or the impact that this blog has had on my life.

-Glen

Dating vs. Courting- What's the difference?

2010-10-09T21:34:00.000-07:00

People always ask me what my plans are for dating. Each time I tell them: "I don't plan to date, I plan to court." They then proceed to tell me that there's basically no difference. So I went to the dictionary.

Dating: (verb) "going out with someone in whom one is romantically interested"

Courting: (verb) "being involved with romantically, typically with the intention of marrying"

There still doesn't appear to be much difference, except for the last few words of the definition.

Let's look at the definition for courting again:

Courting: "being involved with romantically, typically with the intention of marrying"

There's the big difference right there. Dating is actually VERY different than courting. If you think back to the stories that your parents tell you, they might tell you about all the different guys or girls that they "dated", but how often do they tell you about the multiple people that they "courted"? Dating is temporary, but courting usually ends up in marriage.

Isn't that the way that it was meant to be? Proverbs 4:23 says: "Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life."

Do you really want to go second hand shopping? Or do you want God to GIVE you brand new?

I'm going to court, not date. Next time someone asks you, take some time to think. Could courting be right for me?

-Glen

The Qualities of a Good Friendship

2010-09-28T14:59:00.000-07:00

A good friendship is essential to any relationship. Someday, you should marry your best friend. Let's look at some of the characteristics of a good friendship.

1. A friend is kind

No one wants to be friends with someone who isn't kind.

2. A friend is faithful

Do you stick with your friends, even when it's hard?

3. A friend makes you a better person

Do you make those around you better?

4. A friend is knit to your heart

Just like Jonathan and David, true friends know each other's hearts and feelings.

5. A friend can share friends

Jesus referred to Lazarus as "Our friend."

6. A friend expresses love

It isn't about saying "I love you", it's about living it.

7. A friend is willing to wound

Tough love is sometimes necessary to prevent them from getting hurt.

8. A friend strengthens others in God

Do you point others to God, or pull them away from Him?

9. A friend is willing to be second

Your relationship with God should always be first, and a friend should not prevent that.

10. A friend rejoices in blessings

Don't be jealous, be happy for them

11. A friend praises his friends

Don't seek to get glory for yourself. Praise your friends, and they will praise you.

12. A friend doesn't overstay his welcome

Too much of a good thing, no matter how good, is still too much.

13. A friend gives biblical counsel

You don't know everything. Use the best tool you have to help.

14. A friend is sensitive

Know what your friends are dealing with in their lives and act accordingly.

15. A friend sharpens

Influence those around you to stand up for what is right.

16. A friend helps through trials

Be there for your friends when they're going through a tough time.

Try to put these principles into practice in your friendships, they'll work wonders.

-Glen

(Points are from "Just Friends" by Cary Schmidt and Mike Ray)

Guest Post-The Big Picture

2010-08-21T12:16:00.001-07:00

I've been both busy and lacking inspiration the past while, so I decided to ask someone to do a guest post. The following is written by Danica-Lee Szabatin, an MK to Alberta as well as a student at Hyles Anderson College in Hammond, Indiana.

THE BIG PICTURE

by Danica-Lee Szabatin

I am sure everyone has heard the saying, “Love blinds you.” Well, today I want to change that… I wouldn’t say love blinds you because love is not an ooey gooey feeling someone has for another person. Love is an action, and it was portrayed in the greatest way known to man when Christ died for us. I am so glad that my God did not sit up in Heaven and say, “Wow, I love those people on earth. I know they are bound for hell because of their sins, but I just get a warm, fuzzy feeling when I think about them, and they make me feel so happy, and I just love them.” Did God do that? I don’t think so. He took action, and loved us more than we can ever know by showing the highest form of love- -- sacrifice. Romans 5:8 says: “But God commendeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” That’s love. So I am going to change the saying to “Lust blinds you.”

Lust is “pleasure, delight, inclination, or wish.” These are the feelings you get when you get in a relationship with someone. Honestly, you are not going to love that special person until you prove it. After you are married, and you start to realize, “Hey, this person isn’t perfect. Sometimes, we disagree on things. I do things that annoy them, and they do things that annoy me.” When you are still married, after 50 years, and have gone through many trials together and have never given up on each other, then tell me that you love that person. Christ died for us knowing how we were, “…while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”

When you are in a relationship with someone, you get very close to that person. I saw an awesome illustration one time, and I think it shows exactly what I mean when I say, “Lust blinds us.”

A teacher called a teenager up to the platform and told her to close her eyes. While the teenager had her eyes closed the teacher put a very large painting right up close to her face, in front of her eyes.

“Ok, I want you to open your eyes and tell me what you see.” The teacher said.

“I see blue.”

“Okay close your eyes again.” The teacher this time moved back a few steps and told the teenager to open her eyes again and tell what she saw now.

The teenager described a beautiful landscape painting with blue skies, lush forest, gorgeous, colourful flowers, and a shining pond. All-in-all a beautiful picture.

When the teenager had been standing right up close to the picture all she could see was the colour blue. She had to take a step back and get a little distance to see the whole picture.

Right now, you might be in a very serious relationship, and you might be very close to someone. But could it be that you are too close, lust is blinding you, and you are not seeing the whole picture?

God has a beautiful picture planned out for your life, and He is just waiting for you to take a step back and trust Him with it. We trust Him with eternity, with our very souls, so why is it we can’t trust Him with our life and the things of it? Do you really think God is going to give you second best? No, He wants the very best for you. So why don’t you trust Him to give it to you? Why are you busy searching for someone, getting involved with the wrong people, when God has promised He will take care of you, and give you what He knows is best? Just take a step back, wait, trust God, and He will bring the right one to you.

Your friend, Danica-Lee

Some Fatherly Advice

2010-07-22T14:17:00.000-07:00

I have a bad habit of reading ahead in my Glow in the Dark devotional booklet, but today I am glad that I did. This does not appear until August 5th, a day that I am at camp. The following letter was written by Bro. Morris Hunsucker, the assistant pastor of Faith Baptist Church of Avon, Indiana. He originally wrote it to his daughter, but also had it published in Glow in the Dark. I slightly changed it to make it applicable to both genders.

Dear Reader,

1. Be careful not to trust your heart alone. The Lord gave you a brain for a reason, so use it to reason.
Thinking through your “relationship” and honestly evaluating the positives and negatives in the light of God’s will for your future may not sound very romantic; but someday you will live “happily ever ever after” because you did.

2. Don’t expect any relationship with any human to be perfect. We are all flawed by a sin nature. We all make mistakes. The person that you are looking for is not going to be perfect. There was only one perfect person. The person that you are looking for will have their problems; but you will be able to love him/her in spite of them. And sometimes, you will ever love him/her because of them. I am not saying that you must expect or accept anything less than God’s best for your life. I am saying, unless you are perfect, don’t expect or require perfection in others. You want someone who is striving to do right and find God’s will for their life. Only a foolish hypocrite thinks that they are already perfect. Place a high value on a humble mate.

3. Never lower the Biblical standards that you’ve learned from God’s Word, but don’t be afraid to change those which you cannot support or lower those which no person could possibly reach. Be both right and reasonable. By the way, make sure that the person that you are looking for will not lower their standards to accept you. If they accept less than they think is God’s best for them, they will never be happy or satisfied with the relationship.

4. Always be more concerned with what you are putting into a relationship than what you are getting out of it. True love is an all-consuming, self-sacrificing, heart-felt desire to meet the needs of another. At least that’s the definition I get from John 3:16. Have a servant’s heart and find someone who has the same. A relationship where both people are striving to meet the needs of another will be blessed with great joy.

5. Trust your head more than your heart, your eyes more than your ears, and the facts more than your feelings. Choose service over selfishness, faithfulness over flattery, and personal holiness over personal happiness.

6. If you’ve considered this advice and still don’t know how to proceed, then PRAY and WAIT. That will not be easy, but it is the trying your faith that will make you strong. There will be many times on the field of service when all you can do is PRAY and WAIT. Ten when others panic and run, you will be able to stand. Your faith will have grown strong though the patient endurance of the trials that you have already faced. Simply put, you will be able to trust God then, if you learn to trust Him now.

God bless,
Morris Hunsucker

-Glen

Two Books That Changed My Life

2010-06-24T18:57:00.000-07:00

I’m sure you’ve seen those testimonials on TV and on the internet that say: “This product changed my life!” In some cases, it’s true. In others, it’s not. Today I have a testimonial for you. I know that it’s true, because it’s mine. There are two books that changed my life, and I’m going to tell you what they are, and how they did. The first one is obvious- my King James Bible. If it wasn’t for my Bible, I wouldn’t be saved. The Bible tells us that the only way to heaven is though repentance of sin and belief in the sacrificial death of Christ. It also tells us that Christ rose again the third day and now intercedes for us on the right hand of God. My Bible tells me how to live each day, and helps me find God’s will. It cheers me up when I’m sad, and helps me through the rough patches in life. My Bible has changed, and continues to change my life.

The second book that changed my life was “Just Friends” by Cary Schmidt and Mike Ray. I’d always heard that “God works in mysterious ways”, but I hadn’t really seen it in action until a few months ago. It was September of 2009, and I had just had my heart broken by a girl that I thought was “the one”. (Note: I was 16, so she obviously wasn’t, but I didn’t clue into that) I was looking on the Striving Together Publications website at the book “Different by Design” by Cary Schmidt. I had read about it in my Glow in the Dark devotional book, and decided to check it out. At the bottom of the page was a link to “other books by this author” There was a book that caught my interest, so I clicked on it. It turned out to be “Just Friends”

I was considering ordering it online, but didn’t want to pay the expensive S&H from California. A few weeks later, we found out that there was a Youth Conference at Bible Baptist Church, about an hour and a half away. God worked out my work schedule so that I could go, and it turned out that the speaker, Bro. Whitman, was from Bro. Schmidt’s church in California. He brought along some copies of the book, and I bought one for cheaper than on the website, even without the S&H!

I read the book the moment I got home, and have read it 5 times since! It showed me that it’s not caring FOR girls that’s important, it’s caring ABOUT them. Since I read the book, my view of girls and dating completely changed! Now I’m content to wait for God’s perfect choice for my life in His timing.

But that’s not where it ends. Around Christmas, I was looking for a book review about “Just Friends.” I found one on a little blog called “God Will Bless Those Who Wait”, run by a girl named Katie. After reading all the older posts, I found one where she asked for guest writers. Having a burden to share my newfound views on dating with others, and loving to write, I asked her if I could write a post. My first post received excellent feedback, and pretty soon I was writing for it once a month. Then, Katie decided to take a break from running the blog, and asked if I would take it over. So here I am now.

So there you have it, two books that changed my life: my Bible, which showed me how to know that I am going to Heaven when I die; and “Just Friends,” the reason that I am writing this post today. God does work in mysterious ways!

What is Love?

2010-05-28T08:39:00.000-07:00

What is love? Is it that nervous feeling that you get when a special someone enters the room? Is it long phone conversations until the wee hours of the morning? Is it even marriage for that matter? Surprisingly, it's not. I spent a long time trying to figure out what love is, and finally came up with a definition. A few weeks ago, at our church's missions conference, God reinforced that definition by having the visiting preacher quote my definition almost word perfect. So let me ask again, what is love?

Love is not a feeling, but an action. Love is a verb, not a noun. Love is "doing what is best for the other person, no matter how much it inconveniences you." Let's look at the greatest example of love ever--Jesus. Do you really think that He enjoyed being tortured, beaten, mocked, spat upon, and eventually crucified? Obviously not, but it was what was best for us. Jesus put aside the inconvenience of personal suffering so that we could be forgiven of our sins. He did it because He loves us. Jesus' death on the cross is a perfect example of love, because He is perfect.

So how can we display love in our daily lives? First, Matthew 5:44 tells us to love our enemies. Obviously, you will never have feelings for people that treat you bad, but as we learned above, that's not love! Romans 12:20a says, "Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink." Even though you may not like them, you can still show them love by doing what is best for them. Second, we can love our acquaintances. In this way, love is more of an attitude. It's a willingness to show love. If you see someone that needs help, go and help them. In doing so, you can show them love. Even if you don't really know the person, you can still make a difference in their life by showing them love. Finally, we can love our family/friends. Most people think that this would be quite easy. It's not. When your mom asks you to take out the trash right when you reach the most interesting part of your book, do you show her love? Do you "inconvenience yourself to do what is best for another person"?

Imagine how different our lives and relationships would be if we showed true love. Gone would be infatuation and meaningless crushes. Gone would be gossip and hurtful words. Instead, we would focus on doing what is best for other people.

So what about you? Are you showing true love? Are you doing what is best for the other person, no matter how much it inconveniences you? Don’t bother searching for true love; instead, start showing it.

-Glen

Passing the Torch

2010-05-16T22:35:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone! Glen here. The torch has been passed, and I'm kinda nervous to receive it. But, with God's help I can do this. In case you're worried, I won't change too many things. This is still Katie's blog, and I still want it to be pretty much the same when she comes back. For now, though, you're "stuck" with me.

Thanks, Katie, for trusting me with this, I won't let you down.

Some Changes...

2010-05-15T23:54:00.000-07:00

For a few different reasons this blog is now going to be run by both Glen and I. Though it will be mostly Glen...I will be taking a break from blogging for a while and I didn't want to let this blog just sit here when I know we've all been encouraged by Glen's posts. So I thought why not let him run the blog? So thats what will be happening around here. I will probably be checking in once in a while but for the most part Glen will be doing the posting and such.

~Katie

Glen - Are You Really Waiting?

2010-05-10T19:18:00.000-07:00

Are You Really Waiting?

By Glen Cuthbert

I’ve been struggling with trying to find something to write about, so I decided to look at my own life and write about something that I have been having a problem with. Right now, the problem I’m having is not having crushes because I’m waiting on God. I know I’m not alone with this problem. So, I’m writing this month’s post on just that. Just so you know, this post is written as much to me as it is to you. I think it will help all of us.

Trusting God one-hundred percent is always going to be a struggle. Yes, we can all say that we are trusting God for our future mate, but if we just say it, are we really trusting Him? God has that perfect person all picked out, and He doesn’t need our help. No matter how amazing that certain someone that you are interested in may be, the question still remains: Do you completely trust God?

Having a crush while waiting on God is like having a backup plan. Most people have backup plans when they are scared that something will go wrong with their original plan. God doesn’t make mistakes. His way is perfect. Because of this, we don’t need a “plan B” in case something goes wrong. You’re probably wondering, “This person is SO AWESOME, how could they not be ‘the one’?” My question to you is: How can they be?

Going back to the first post that I ever wrote for this blog, I wrote about how “the right person at the wrong time is still the wrong person.” Seriously, we’re all still young. The time is not yet right, so the person is also not right. No matter how “right” they may seem.

Also, crushes come at a price. I’ve written in the past about giving your heart away. There is still pain, there is still heartbreak. I’ve never had a girlfriend, but I’ve been hurt just from “innocent crushes.” There is no thing as an “innocent crush.” People still get hurt.

God made us with a natural sense of attraction. That’s just part of being human. But the real question is: “Will you trust God and control those attractions?” View guys or girls that you are attracted to as prospective good friends, and work on those friendships. Someday, if you go about it right, you should marry one of your closest friends. So, start now, and you may increase your chances with that person more than you would have with a crush. Or, you might just find out things about them that you wouldn’t have seen if you were still interested in them. Just make sure that your motives for friendship are right. Trust God, build your friendships, and He will take care of the rest.

Do you completely trust God, or do you have a backup plan?

Psalm 27:14- “Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.”

Glen - Are You Trusting God?

2010-04-06T11:15:00.000-07:00

Are You Trusting God?

by Glen Cuthbert

While reading "I Kissed Dating Goodbye", I found a summary of a story from William J. Bennett's Book of Virtues. It's the story of Peter, a boy who tends to be impatient and is constantly daydreaming of the future.

One day while wandering in the forests, Peter meets a strange old woman who gives him a most tantalizing opportunity—the chance to skip the dull, mundane moments of life. She hands Peter a silver ball from which a tiny gold thread protrudes. “This is your life thread,” she explains. “Do not touch it and time will pass normally. But if you wish time to pass more quickly, you have only to pull the thread a little way and an hour will pass like a second. But I warn you, once the thread has been pulled out, it cannot be pushed back in again.”

This magical thread seems the answer to all of Peter’s problems. It is just what he has always wanted. He takes the ball and runs home.

The following day in school Peter has his first opportunity to put the silver ball to use. The lesson is dragging, and the teacher scolds Peter for not concentrating. Peter fingers the silver ball and gives the thread a slight tug. Suddenly, the teacher dismisses the class, and Peter is free to leave school. He is overjoyed! How easy his life will now be. From this moment, Peter begins to pull the thread a little every day.

But soon Peter begins to use the magic thread to rush through larger portions of life. Why waste time pulling the thread just a little every day when he can pull it hard and complete school altogether?He does so and finds himself out of school and apprenticed in trade. Peter uses the same technique to rush through his engagement to his sweetheart. He cannot bear and wait months to marry her so he uses the gold thread to hasten the arrival of the wedding day.

Peter continues to pattern throughout his life when hard, trying times come, he escapes then with his magic thread.

But sadly when he comes to the end of his life, Peter realizes the emptiness of such an existence. By allowing impatience and discontentment to rule him, Peter has robbed himself of life’s riches moments and memories. With only the grave to look forward to, he deeply regrets ever having used the magic thread.

How many of us waste our time wondering, dreaming and fretting about the future? I've been guilty of it, and I'm sure you have too. People are naturally curious, and the future provides the greatest unknown. Marriage is very far away for many of us, so why worry about it? I know a twelve year old girl that is constantly asking, "Could this guy be the one?" She still has at least eight years before she can get married! Yet, many of us do the same thing, asking, "Could this guy/girl be the one?" I'll tell you right now. They're not. At least not yet. Until that "yet" happens, do we need to worry about it? NO!

Just think how much more could we do for God, if we would focus on today, instead of tomorrow. God knows how it will go, and He is in control. All we need to do is trust Him. God is the Author and Storyteller of our lives.The story is already completely written, and He knows how it ends, but He chooses to read it to us one chapter at a time for a reason. Here are a few verses for you to think about:

Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths"

Matthew 6:34a "Take no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself."

Psalm 27:14 "Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD."

Psalm 37:5 "Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass."

There is no need to worry about who God wants you to marry. Don't try to peek ahead in the book! God doesn't want you to know that yet! Instead, trust that He cares about you, and that He will do what is best for you.

Have a blessed Easter, and remember the sacrifice that Jesus made, because he LOVED us.

Does The Term Really Matter?

2010-03-21T15:37:00.000-07:00

I was reading through "Boy Meets Girl" (by Joshua Harris) again today and God brought something to my mind.

Actually, God showed me something I've been doing wrong.

And kept thinking "No, I didn't do that! I just know I didn't do that!"

So I signed on blogger,

looked at some of my old posts on here...

And guess what?

I have been doing something wrong.

Boy, thats not a fun thing to admit.

Wanna know what it is?

Of course you do...

Well, God showed me that when I talk about relationships, whether I'm posting on here or talking to a friend, I come off really hard and make it sound like Courtship (what I call courtship at least) is the only way thats right or that works.

But God brought it to mind that the term or what you call the relationship doesn't matter. What matters is whether God is the center of that relationship and if it is honoring to Him or not.

I know some people who call their relationship "Courtship" and it is not a God honoring relationship at all. And on the other hand, I know some people who call their relationship "Dating" and it is very God honoring and you can clearly see God through it.

So does the term really matter?

No.

I do still like the term courtship better then dating...but thats just what I like.

It sounds more old-fashion and romantic...but again thats just me. :)

Call your relationship (or future relationship) whatever you want...

Just keep God at the center of it.

Anyways, I guess I kind of just wanted to clear this up and apologize for the way I've sounded in some of my posts.

Glen - Who Has Your Heart?

2010-03-05T07:57:00.000-08:00

Here is another post by Glen. He will be writing a post for us once a month...I'm sure you will all enjoy them. I really enjoy this one! : ) Please feel free to contact Glen through his email: gcuthbert35@cogeco.ca

Who Has Your Heart?

by Glen Cuthbert

It was finally here-Anna's wedding day, the day she had dreamed about and planned for months. The small, picturesque church was crowded with friends and family.

Sunlight poured through the stained-glass windows, and the gentle music of a string quartet filled the air. Anna walked down the aisle toward David. Joy surged within her. This was the moment for which she had waited so long. He gently took her hand, and they turned toward the altar.

But as the minister began to lead Anna and David through their vows, the unthinkable happened. A girl stood up in the middle of the congregation, walked quietly to the altar, and took David's other hand. Another girl approached and stood next to the first, followed by another. Soon, a chain of six girls stood by him as he repeated his vows to Anna.

Anna felt her lip begin to quiver as tears welled up in her eyes. "Is this some kind of joke?" she whispered to David.

"I'm ... I'm sorry, Anna," he said, staring at the floor.

"Who are these girls, David? What is going on?" she gasped.

"They're girls from my past," he answered sadly. "Anna, they don't mean anything to me now ... but I've given part of my heart to each of them."

"I thought your heart was mine," she said.

"It is, it is," he pleaded. "Everything that's left is yours."

A tear rolled down Anna's cheek. Then she woke up.

I was floored when I read this story in "I Kissed Dating Goodbye". It left me wondering, "How many times have I given my heart away?"

Have you ever asked yourself the same question? Every one of us has had people in our past. Have you given your heart to them? Once you give your heart to someone, you never get all of it back. If we keep giving our hearts away to every guy/girl that catches our interest, then how can we expect to have anything left for the person that God wants us to marry?

So what can we do about it? Well, I've found Someone Who I can give my heart to that promises to give it all back when His timing is right. Let me ask you this: Does He have your heart?

"Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." Proverbs 4:23

Can't Think Of A Good Title...

2010-03-04T09:26:00.000-08:00

I've done a lot of thinking lately about this whole single and waiting on God thing. I've had some conversations about dating that have really had me asking myself why. Why don't I date? Why do I want to save my first kiss for my wedding day? Why am I staying single when there are plenty of guys that I could date? Why do I sit and watch my friends date guy after guy while I've never dated anyone? Why do I keep myself emotionally and psychically pure for one guy?

It makes me wonder...what is your reason for waiting? Is it just because your parents don't want you to date? Are you just trying to save yourself from the hurt that comes with dating and heartbreak? Or is it because you want to honor your future spouse and glorify God? It is good to obey your parents, and its even a wise choice to save yourself from the pain of dating and heartbreak...but the number one reason should be because its what God wants and it honors your future spouse.

This staying single and waiting for one person isn't considered normal or good in the world. In fact, if you've never dated or now choose not to, then people think there is something wrong with you. The "normal" 19 year old girl is either obsessing over the guy shes currently 'in like' with or crying over the last guy that broke her heart. I mean, you are just plain weird if you make it to almost 20 years old and have never even been on a date or kissed a guy. lol

I think that is hard for me sometimes. Loneliness is a hard part of waiting, but hearing what people say about you is also really hard. It's only by the grace of God that Christian young people are about to remain pure and wait for the one God made for them. And you should all be proud of yourselves and of God working through you. Your future spouses will be so proud of you for waiting for them.

I'm so very thankful that God has given me the strength to remain pure and wait for Him to bring my husband to me. And thank about it...what a gift that will be for our future spouses!!

Okay, so I'm not sure what the point of this post is. I just had all these little thoughts in my head and figured I should get them out of there. LOL! Hope it wasn't to confusing for ya! :)

Guest Post 5 - "The Right Person At The Right Time"

2010-02-21T13:15:00.001-08:00

The Right Person at the Right Time

by Glen Cuthbert (age 17)

Glen's Email: gcuthbert35@cogeco.ca

"How will I know who the person that God wants me to marry is?" Chances are you've probably asked this question before. I know I sure have. The answer that I got was: "When God says it's the right time to know."

I didn't really understand that, until one day I was thinking about an interesting statement by Cary Schmidt in the book "Just Friends". The statement was: "The right person at the wrong time is still the wrong person." And then it hit me. You will know who the right person for you to marry is when they are the right person. The problem with many of us teens today is that we believe that the right person is out there for us somewhere, and we waste our time looking for them. The only problem is, the right person is not out there, because they're not the right person yet. Why not? Because it's not the right time yet. So when do they become the right person? Why, at the right time, of course. God has a plan for each one of us, and for most people, that plan includes getting married. He will bring the right person along, in HIS timing. Only then will they be the right person.

So do yourself a favor. Don't waste your time looking for the right person. You won't find them. Instead, focus on being the right person. In God's time, once someone becomes the right person, God will bring the two of you together.

"If you keep following God, there's no way in the universe that He would let you marry the wrong person." -Bro. Cary Schmidt (Associate Pastor, Lancaster Baptist Church)

"The Single Gift"

2010-01-24T21:02:00.000-08:00

"The Single Gift"

How blessed you are, you single one,

Don't talk of care and woes.

You've got too much to be thankful for,

Oh what, you'd like to know.

It's no mistake, no misdirection

Of God's perfect plan

That you've not found your special lady

Or you, that certain man.

God loves you so and has much more

To give then you've ever received.

That He's giving His best to you right now,

You really must believe.

His best is Himself, do you have it in full

Or only a bit on the side?

No man can meet your needs like God,

Nor can a lovely bride.

If your life's not complete, you know that Jesus is

And your life He will fill

If you'll only put Him first each day

And live to do His will.

He's gifted you for undistracted

Devotion to the Lord.

There should be nothing that can interfere

With Him and prayer and the Word.

Unless you let down the guard of your heart

And let others take His place,

Then you'll lack joy and peace and hope

And not experience His grace.

So give your heart right back to God,

Let Him keep it safe for you.

And when it's better then His best,

He'll make your one into two.

~Donna L. Mihura ~

I like this poem so much that I'm posting it on both of my blog! : ) It is really sweet and very encouraging!

"Faithfully"

2010-01-18T22:03:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know I post a lot of the Ludy's stuff...but God has used their books and songs to greatly encourage me. And I hope by posting some of it, it will encourage you too. : )

I love this song of theirs! They have a lot of really beautiful songs, but I think this one might just be my favorite or at least its tied for first. : ) Hope y'all enjoy it!

Tonight I saw a shooting star

Made me wonder where you are

For years I have been dreaming of you

And I wonder if you're thinking of me too

In this world of cheap romance

And love that only fades after the dance

They say that I'm a fool to wait for something more

How can I really love someone I've never seen before

But I have longed for true love every day that I have lived

And I know that real love is all about learning how to give

So I pray that god will bring you to me

And I pray you'll find me waiting faithfully

Faithfully, I am yours

From now until forever

Faithfully, I will write

Write you a love song with my life

Cause this kind of loves worth waiting for

No matter how long it takes I am yours

Faithfully

Tonight I saw two lovers kiss

Reminded me of my own loneliness

They say that I'm a fool to keep on praying for you

How can I give up pleasure for a dream that won't come true

But I will keep believing that god still has a plan

And though I can't see you now,

I know that he can

And someday I will give you all of me

Until I find you, I'll be waiting faithfully

Faithfully, I am yours

From now until forever

Faithfully, I will write

Write you a love song with my life

Cause this kind of loves worth waiting for

No matter how long it takes I am yours

Faithfully

A Little Love Story

2010-01-01T20:25:00.000-08:00

Okay so I'm sure most of you know by now that I am a bit of a 'hopeless romantic'...and some people would say I'm not just a bit of one, but that I am completely and wholly a hopeless romantic. But we won't listen to those people. ; ) But I will admit that I do love to read good clean sappy love stories, and watch sappy love stories. I just love that kind of stuff...I cry over movies and books all the time. I'm just a sappy kinda person I guess. : ) So I'm going to share this cute little love story with y'all.

I read this in the book "When God Writes Your Love Story" by Eric & Leslie Ludy and I thought it was so cute! I even told it to my family that night at dinner...and of course they all said something about me being a hopeless romantic. lol But anyways, I hope y'all enjoy this. (oh, and its a true story as well!) And I'm going to try and get back into posting on here too. : )

"Lieutenant John Blandford was in New York City at Grand Central station, and he looked up at the bog clock. It said five til six. His heart was racing. At exactly six o'clock he was going to meet the girl whom he thought he was in love with but had never met. This is what had happened...

While he was in training as a fighter pilot during World War II, he happened to go to the library and checked out a book. As he flipped through the pages, he noticed that someone had made notes in the margins. Reading the insightful observations in beautiful handwriting, he said to himself, I would love to meet whoever wrote these notes; they seem to be so kind, gentle, and wise.

He looked in the front of the book and saw a name: Hollis Meynell, New York City. He decided to try and find her. With the help of a New York City phone book, he found her address and wrote her a letter. The day after he wrote her, he was shipped overseas to fight in the war.

Surprisingly, Hollis answered John's letter. The two corresponded back and forth throughout the war. "Her letters were just like the marvelous notes she had written in that book," John recalled. "She was so comforting and so helping."

One time John confessed in a letter that he had been scared to death when he'd found himself surrounded by enemy planes. Hollis had assured him that all brave men are afraid at times. She suggested that the next time he felt fear, he should imagine her voice reciting, "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for Thou art with me."

As they continued to write, John began to realize that he was having romantic feelings toward Hollis. He wrote, "Send me a picture," and she declined saying, "If your feeling for me has any reality, what I look like won't matter."

Still, he was intrigued by this woman and longed to meet her in person. Finally that day came when he was able to return to the States on leave. He mentioned in one of his letters that he was coming home and would like to take her to dinner. She arranged to meet him at Grand Central station at 6:00 p.m. by the big clock. "You'll know who I am because I'll be wearing a red rose," she wrote.

At last the day had come. John waited nervously to finally meet the girl he thought he loved. Then his heart leaped as a young woman approached, her slim figure capped off by an attractive face framed with curling blond hair. In her pale-green suit she looked fresh and lively, and her flower-blue eyes sparkled.

He moved toward her without realizing she was not wearing a rose. She welcomed his approach with a quiet, "Going my way, soldier?" But as he took another step, he realized that just beyond her stood another woman--a plump, graying woman with a red rose adorning her rumpled coat.

He stopped cold, utterly torn between following the winsome young beauty in the green suit and keeping his commitment to the woman whose letters had so uplifted him during the war.

Abruptly, he made his decision. With unhesitating strides he approached the plump woman, whose face beamed with a warm smile. "I'm Lieutenant John Blandford, and you--you must be Miss Meynell. I'm so glad you could meet me. Would you join me for dinner?"

The woman's smile grew broader with what appeared to be quiet amusement. "I don't know what this is all about, Son," she said. The she pointed toward a figure in a green suit, who was now nearly out of sight. "That young lady gave me this rose and asked me to wear it while walking through the train station. She said that if you asked me to go with you, I was to let you know she'd be waiting for you in the restaurant across the street."

"She said it was some kind of test."

"When Dreams Come True"

2009-12-15T16:24:00.000-08:00

Title:

"When Dreams Come True"

By:

Eric & Leslie Ludy

About This Book:

(taken from the back cover)

"This daringly real, intensely moving love story gives vision and hope to everyone in search of a love worth waiting for. In their bestseller When God Writes Your Love Story, Eric and Leslie Ludy described the breathtaking perfection of God's plans for each young person and offered fresh guidelines for being Christlike in relationships with the opposite sex. When Dreams Come True shares the Ludys' personal story, illustrating how they lived out the principles of the first book in their own romance and marriage."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

You know, I have read many stories of people who have had godly relationships...but I'd have to say that the Ludy's story might just beat all. This book starts out when they are both children and goes all the way until they are married. This book was a great blessing to me. You know how you often wonder if anyone else out there feels the way you do about relationships and the whole waiting on God thing? Well, I'll tell you this...you know while reading this book that Eric and Leslie completely understand how you feel and where you're coming from. They were already there...and God led them thru it. You can see the hand of God on their relationship from the start...it is an amazing love story that only God could have written! This was one of the few books that I have read in the last week...and God has taught me a lot thru them. I would strongly encourage y'all to get ahold of some of the Ludy's books and read them...and while reading them, ask God to open your heart and show you what you need.

Links:

Eric & Leslie Ludy's Website

Their Online Store

Their Books On Amazon.com

A Quote By Leslie Ludy

2009-12-13T18:37:00.000-08:00

Just something that I've been pondering the last few weeks...

"Even a beautiful God-scripted love story can never satisfy the way Jesus does. Even the most heroic and Christlike man on earth can never fulfill the longings of our heart like the true Prince and lover of our soul (Jesus Christ). And until we are able to truly make Him our first love, until we are willing to give up our dream of an earthly love story for His sake, we will never know the fullness of Him who fills us all in all. We will always be looking to a mere man to meet the desires of our heart, rather than to the One who created us, who knows us better than we know ourselves, and who gave His very life's blood to rescue us."

~Leslie Ludy~

I know, I know...

2009-12-12T13:29:00.000-08:00

I have been doing a horrible job posting on here! I am so sorry! Let me explain a bit tho...

First off, I hope y'all enjoyed the guest post! I loved each and everyone of them! They were all stories that greatly encouraged and blessed me!! I might have some more in the future but those 4 were it for now. : ) If you didn't read them all, please go back and do so...I am sure you will enjoy them! : )

Second, I really couldn't post for a while there. I had become really discouraged and discontent with being single and I knew that if I posted something it would either not be very encouraging or I would just be posting for the sake of posting. I am doing so much better now! I read a few books this last week and God really thought me a lot thru them. ("Sacred Singleness" by Leslie Ludy & "When Dreams Come True" by Eric and Leslie Ludy) I know that I have a lot on my heart that I can post about now...I just haven't taken the time to sit down and do it yet. lol I'm hoping to get a post or two up this week...but don't hold me to it! LOL

But all that said, I'll try and post soon...I promise! : )

Guest Post 4 - Kelly & Katy: A Courtship In Progress

2009-12-05T06:20:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I think this is going to be my last guest post for now. I hope to have a few more within the next few weeks, but we will see. : ) This one was written by my dear friend Katy and I am sooooo excited for y'all to read it!! Please be sure to go over and check out Katy's blog when you're done reading, I'm sure you'll love it as much as I do. : ) You can also go over and check out Kelly's blog, I'm sure he'd love to have some visitors as well. : )

Kelly & Katy:

A Courtship In Progress

"It all started on April 18, 2008 with a simple "random" comment on my blog. Kelly had been surfing blogs and had listed as one of his favorite movies "Last Flight Out" and I guess when you click on the link it will take you to other blogs that have that listed as and out of the 88 blogs of however many thousands there are on blogspot he clicked on my blog and commented on a post I had done about John Piper and honoring parents. The God thing was that I had not put "Last Flight Out" as my favorite movie Abby had (she had a blog on the same profile accidentally and changed it) and I had just a few days before considered changing my profile but then decided against it. So that was kind of a God thing :) So we started commenting back and forth which turned into long IM conversations, which lasted hours.

In October 2008 Kelly told me that we needed to not talk for awhile and broke off almost all contact for about 10 months due to some things that he needed to prove to his parents. When we started talking again in May 2009 I was not really ready to trust him at all. I had been hurt once before and I just wasn't ready to take that chance again. I was relived to know that his parents knew about me and we started talking on the phone. I did not have any feelings for him at this time (or at least I told myself that...truth to be told I kind of buried them away and tried to forget them). While he always had been spiritually mature in some ways he had not become a man yet and I was definitely not the woman I needed to be either.

So we talked on the phone a few times in the spring and then I headed off to camp and he headed of to 3 1/2 months in Papua New Guinea leading a team of all older guys in building a ministry center for To Every Tribe Ministries (the mission board we as a family were planning on going to the mission field with).
As I said before, I had had feelings for him before but I did not really have any feelings for him beside friendship for him during this time. Although I did pray that the Lord would take him from boyhood into manhood during his time in PNG I didn't really give him much thought the entire summer. I guess he did a lot of thinking about me though :) When he came back he called me and within the first two minutes of our conversation I realized that I was not talking to the boy that I had been before but instead to a GOD CENTERED man that had just...emerged. It was really amazing!

We started talking again and I started to really struggle with feelings that I had thought were non-existent except now things were definitely God centered it was really hard. So I started just surrendering him to the Lord and my desires to the Lord. Then, all the sudden Jen had been talking to him about his part in the American Gospel Tour and she said that there was no way she was going to invite him on it unless we had met him in person. The next thing I know he and his brother were coming out to visit us on November 10th to meet and discuss the Gospel Tour. Now truly he was coming out to discuss the gospel tour.

So three weeks before I was going to meet him in person I was a wreck. Then I realized that I HAD BEEN surrendering my singleness to the Lord BUT with lots of strings attached. So I came before the Lord one day and told Him that I was not only surrendering my singleness for the present but for the rest of my life EVEN IF it meant that I was going to be single for the rest of my life. In fact, I chose to expect it. Once I made that decision my whole attitude changed and I began jealously guard my heart. Once I started that every time I would start to think if only or stuff like that I would instantly give it to the Lord and try to get re-focused on Him.

So the 1st two days that Kelly and his brother Mike were at our house were horrible for me! Not because of them at all in fact Kelly was everything I had ever dreamed that he would be and more but I just was really quiet and not crazy outgoing and I just felt like I had disappointed him. Plus Danny and Abby are crazy outgoing so I just really felt bad (and a little bit jealous lol). The ironic part is that God completely confirmed to him that he should go ahead and ask my parents if he could pursue a courtship relationship (dating with a purpose of...marriage) during the first two days! I actually asked him about it and was like "How on earth did you know I didn't even talk?" and he told me that I didn't have to talk because he just observed and knew that the Lord wanted him to move forward.
In the meanwhile, I have absolutely NO CLUE and as the week progressed I was working overtime to keep my feelings for him (because yeah...I had a lot!) surrendered to the Lord.

One thing that the Lord had been laying on my heart the last six months before Kelly even was at all back in the picture was that I was supposed to go and serve the Lord in the foreign mission field. I had accepted that that probably meant I was supposed to be single so I was just moving towards that goal already. The whole week Kelly had been asking me questions about missions and how I felt about surrendering all to the Lord and being willing to serve Him in a hostile and/or persecuted area. I had absolutely no qualms about that and told him what the Lord had laid on my heart concerning missions. Little did I know that he was checking off qualities (because he is going to be a missionary to PNG).

So the last day rolls around and it was just not a good day for me. I felt like there was so much left unsaid. 10 minutes before I had to leave for work I really felt like I needed to let him know that my #1 fear about going to the mission field was that people would think that I was going just because he was going WHICH WAS NOT THE CASE AT ALL but I was afraid that people would think it would be. So I blurted it out to him like 10 minutes before I left and all he said was "It took you all week to tell me that?" To which I replied "Well, I kinda just got the courage up." And then that was it! OMW, I was a WRECK at work that day. I was almost in tears the whole time so finally at one point I just went into the kitchen, physically raised my hands to the Lord and surrendered the whole situation to Him.
So then on Wednesday night Kelly called and we talked for about 2 hours and I walked away from that conversation accepting the fact that while I had feelings for him I needed to just wait and we both needed to guard our hearts and be really really careful to honor the Lord in everything.

SO on Thursday, November 19, 2009 at 1:04pm (I know how sad is that lol) Kelly called me. I was on the way home from babysitting and Abby was driving. So I was just rambling on COMPLETELY oblivious when all the sudden he goes "So I have been thinking a lot about our conversation last night." I started worrying. I was sure I had said something that I shouldn't have so I am thinking up this amazing apology in my mind when all the sudden he goes into telling me that he knew he was really buddy buddy with Abby and Jen but that it was just because he was trying to be careful so he is saying all this stuff and I am SO OBLIVIOUS STILL so all the sudden the phone cuts out and then it comes back in and by this time we are home and Abby and Danny had gotten out of the car. So all the sudden he says "I have a question to ask you." And I said (COMPLETELY oblivious) "Yeah?" And he goes, "I have already talked to your parents and they have given me their blessing to ask you if you would be willing to enter into a courtship relationship with me?" All the sudden I was having a hard time breathing. The first words to come out of my mouth were NOT "Yes I would love to enter into a courtship relationship with you." NOPE, not me! Instead they were "Are you serious?" I was so shocked I seriously thought I was dreaming! When he assured me that he was indeed incredibly serious I got really quiet (again still working on the whole breathing thing). He very nicely said, "Well you don't have to give me an answer now." And I am thinking: I would really like to give you an answer now but I just can't seem to get all the things I want to say from my brain to my mouth! I think I said something about how I had been praying for months about this THEN I asked "Can I give you your answer now?" To which he replied "Yes" (and he sounded a bit relived I wonder why? lol). So when I could breathe again I said "Yes, I would love to enter into a courtship relationship with you." I think that next thing I said was "So, does this mean you are my boyfriend now?" :) And I am so glad he is!

So that is my story...the shortened version. God is just so good and it has been absolutely amazing how much I have grown in the Lord in the short time we have been in a relationship! I have realized that more now then ever I have to jealously guard my relationship with Jesus. Keeping Christ first and my relationship with Kelly second. It has definitely been a transition but I am so excited to see what the Lord has for us next! The neat thing too is having the blessing of all four parents :) He definitely went about it in the right way!

So right now we are moving forward trusting the Lord and taking things day by day. Our hearts desire is to bring honor and glory to the Lord through our relationship because when it comes down to it, our lives should be about Him and not about us."

Guest Post 3 - Amber & Marshall's Story

2009-11-24T09:12:00.000-08:00

Guest post 3 is here!! Yay!! This is the story of how my friend Amber and her husband Marshall met and married. I have known Amber for probably close to a year now, and have so enjoyed getting to know her! I can't believe how many kindred spirits God has let me "meet" on blogger. Please take the time to go look at Amber's blog: "Joyful Homemaker" And she also has facebook, so you can friend her there as well. : ) Enjoy reading...

Once upon a time… in the fellowship hall of church one afternoon of preparing for the missions meeting… Some of the ladies and I were sitting at a table chatting about this and that when Ms. Ellen happened to mention that I should think about marrying her nephew- Marshall. He had just moved to Gainesville a few months prior and had come to church once or twice since. I told her that was ridiculous because he was not even saved and had not been to church for awhile. I didn’t even know anything about him other than his name was Marshall, and he probably was not saved
The subject was dropped, and I did not think anything else about it until “Lo and behold!” the next morning he came walking into church! I thought- “It does not mean anything! Just a coincidence”. Well, Pastor preached one of the toughest messages on Christian dress standards that he has ever preached. He just knew that Marshall (and all the rest of us) would never be back. However, at the end of service Marshall stood up and said that he wanted to join the church! We all were shocked! (To put it mildly) Pastor talked to him and told him to keep coming to see if this was really what he wanted. (And to see if he could\would stick it out) Well, Marshall came here and there- mostly Sunday mornings. We prayed for him, but I was not too concerned with whether or not I was supposed to marry him. I knew that salvation must come first. Also, I was only 16 years old. Definitely too young.
Anyway, after several weeks of coming here and there, Marshall came on a Wednesday night (June 25th to be exact). After service he told Ms. Rita that he had gotten saved. She went and got Pastor and eventually the news made it to the rest of us. So then I started kinda thinking that maybe this fella -“Marshall” was my Prince Charming. I kept it to myself, but prayed about it. I did not want to get emotionally attached when really there was no reason for me to. Marshall had not even noticed me.
Marshall kept coming to church- totally oblivious to girls, and most especially me. Throughout the next few months I found out that he was Marshall Reeves, 25 years old, and his birthday was in January. A few people had caught on that maybe I was supposed to marry Marshall. I also found out that Marshall was a Jr., which was very important to me (long story). Then I happened to hear that he had been in the Marines- also very important to me!
He was baptized in November of 2003. Since he lived on the lake, he was baptized in the lake and we had a service and food at his house. This was just great news for the conspiring females that wanted us married. Well, his house was just too cute, and while we were there I could tell that my mother and Ms. Ellen were imagining what I would look like “setting up housekeeping in here”.
About 10 months passed and God started dealing with Marshall about getting married. Marshall did not really have anyone in particular in mind, but he decided to talk to Pastor. Pastor gave Marshall some guidelines to go by in choosing a mate, and God made things very clear.
On October 7th 2004 Marshall called and asked if he could come over to spend the evening. He came and we had pizza with my family, then they all went and watched a movie and Marshall and I sat at the table and talked for a little while. We went out here and there for the next few weeks.
On October 26th Marshall sent a dozen roses to me. Of course, I was on cloud nine the whole day! We went to visit my grandparents and Marshall met us there. Before he left he asked me to walk outside with him. He then proposed very sweetly, on bended knee! I don’t remember all that he said- I was just so glad to hear him say “I love you”!!!! Of course, I said “Yes”, and he put the ring on my finger. (We had both picked it out some days back.)
We set the date for April 16th, then realized that there was no way, and no reason for us to wait that long, so we moved the date up to February 5th. We were married on Saturday February 5th, at 2:00 in the afternoon. I walked down the aisle to a string quartet playing Canon in D, and he cried. (He’s so sweet!) Pastor preached, but I don’t remember much of that. (Do you blame me?!?!) We started our honeymoon in Gatlinburg, then came home and have been continuing our honeymoon ever since.

I thank God for putting us together. He knew exactly what we needed, and how to get us together. To God be the glory! Great things He has done!

**Next Guest Post Coming Soon!!**

Guest Post 2 - Courtship: A New Journey

2009-11-18T07:21:00.000-08:00

Yippie! Guest post #2 is here! I have SOOO enjoyed doing theses guest posts! This one is by Rebecca over at "A Rather Unusual Maiden For God" (there is a link to her site at the end of the post). I have so enjoyed getting to know Rebecca over the last several months! Her blog is always an encouragement to me. When I first started reading her blog she was not yet courting Justin, so it has been so amazing to read about their journey for the start. And I'm sure you will enjoy this post greatly! So without farther ado...

Courtship: A New Journey.

My journey on Courtship began on March 20th 2009. How it all began is quite the tale
December 10th 2008, the college at my church was having a Christmas Banquet.
It was a hard time for me, because my best friend of 11 years had just moved to a different state, and I missed her a lot I didn’t know many other college girls, so I was lonely. Long story short, I attended the banquet next to a courting couple. I didn’t know these two very well. What was “worse” was that I was facing an empty chair.

Little did I know what was about to happen...for God had a “reserved” sign on that chair
;) I see a hand on the chair, someone asks, “May I sit with you?” I look up to see a college guy, a sophomore student- (one I had at least known the name of for a year )- Justin M. I said, “yes”...and that was how it all began.

I think it interesting that for one entire year we both at least knew who the other person was, but never really knew what was about to happen We had never really talked before that banquet... some people joke that we haven’t stopped talking since

Every courtship is different, Justin and I along with both of our parents decided to have the “no touch policy” rule, always have a chauffeur, etc. One thing we also have is something called, “Open Honesty” (we call it “total” honesty too.)

Even though we have chosen to court, and do things God’s way; the world’s dating methods and philosophy still infiltrates. Open Honesty is based on God’s word.
James 5:16 says
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Basically the world says, “when you are dating, put your best foot forward, keep your faults hidden,”
But in Open Honesty, we do talk about our faults to each other. Since the point of courting is marriage at the end, why not be honest? We have talked about how we deal with anger, personal fears, worrying, etc. As well as struggles.
Justin recently told me about his struggle (the world certainly is hard on our guys) He wanted to tell me about this particular struggle for a while, but was worried about how to bring it up. But there was no need for worry, as God totally prepared the whole conversation We girls are great at sharing our struggles and problems, but guys do find it harder, especially when it is with the one they love so much. I’m very, very, very ( ) glad he shared his struggle with me. Trust is so beautiful to have I treasure the ability to know that I can share struggles and problems with him too, and know that he will not judge me for them, but pray for me and with me
Girls, we can do our share to help our guys with their struggles PRAY for them And if you want to know a really great way to help, visit this site...

http://www.therebelution.com/modestysurvey/

Open Honesty isn’t just for problems We also discuss so many other things, fun things too We talk about our preferences, standards, likes and dislikes, and opinions. We have had many talks about food likes and dislikes (they were hilarious ) Justin is now determined that he will someday get me to eat onions (I do not like onions by the way ) We have talked about raising children, running a home, driving, coupons, writing books, and on and on

I can not praise God enough for all his blessings upon this courtship, it is really wonderful to see how He has been leading it It is worth it to wait for the one He has created for you I remember what it was like to wonder, “Is there really someone out there for me? How will I know when I have found them?” It was a difficult time, but it doesn’t need to be God does everything for His glory, and He will make sure how you meet that special someone will bring Him great glory And it is very exciting to be apart of bringing glory to our wonderful Savior

God bless,
~Rebecca

A Rather Unusual Maiden for God

**The picture above is Rebecca and Justin.**

Guest Post 1 - "Waiting For God's Will"

2009-11-16T09:29:00.000-08:00

This is a short story written by Augustine Sujon Baroi. He is a young man from Bangladesh. Augustine doesn't have a blog yet, but if you would like to reach him this is his email address: asbaroi@gmail.com I want to thank him for writing this story for my blog! I am sure you will all enjoy reading it.

Waiting For God's Will

Once there were two sisters. They lived with their patents in a countryside. The name of elder was Salome and the younger Naomi. Salome wasn’t so beautiful. She was short. But there was something divine in her countenance. A soft and mild touch was in her face. Moreover she had deepness in her character. On the other hand, Naomi was very fair and tall. But she was very proud of her beauty.

One evening the two sisters were in their room. Both the girls had to share a room with each other. Naomi was smiling when Salome asked, ‘What’s so funny?’

‘It’s a very funny thing!’ said Naomi, laughing, ‘Peter proposed me today. Ha, ha, ha, poor, little wretch! Five disgusting fellows of this countryside already proposed me in vain. ’

‘Peter is a good man. Humble and simple,’ said her sister.

‘You are a backdated girl.’ Naomi said quite angrily. ‘I won’t marry any of them. They all are poor. And I will marry a rich man.’

‘You can’t choose your husband in your own judgment, rather you should pray to God. He will provide you a good husband. You should wait for the right man.’ said Salome softly.

‘Again you are talking like a fool.’ said Naomi. ‘I can’t let anyone to choose my husband, whom I’ve never seen. It’s my own job. Ok? As my life is my own, and I’ve to lead it at my own will. Don’t tell me again about your God. Let Him be yours.’

Salome was very sad to hear the blasphemous way her sister was talking. She paused a while, then said:

‘Our father is a pastor. We hear about God, our Heavenly father everyday. But you don’t believe Him. What’s wrong with you?’

‘There isn’t any thing wrong with me.’ Naomi’s tone was bold. ‘I have brains, and I’ll do what seems good to me. I’m not blind like you.’

Salome wanted to tell her more about God, but she found Naomi had left the room without showing any excuse.

She sighed and thought. ‘We’re two sisters. Our father is a pastor of a Baptist Church. He is well known for his good behavior and simplicity. Everybody respects him. But his younger daughter doesn’t believe in God. It is a great pain for us.’

Then Salome knelt down and prayed for Naomi.

The father of these two young girls was a very good man. He got honors from others. But his wife and his youngest daughter didn’t have much respect towards him. To them he was a worthless man. It was because Joe, (for that was his name) got a little salary. The members of his church were very poor. Most of them were farmers. They loved their pastor. So often they brought something for their pastor. Joe and his oldest daughter were happy in their simple station. They loved their Lord. But the mother and the youngest daughter were quite opposite of them. They wanted to live in luxury. Joe everyday tried to make them understand that they should be happy with what they got from God. But they would not hear him, and his wife often ridiculed him for being happy with a little supply.

One day Naomi came back home from outside. She was very excited. She went to her room, where she found Salome cleaning the room.

She stopped Salome and wrapped her with her arms. ‘I’ve met a very handsome man in the street, who has come from the capital. And he said I’m the fairest lady he had ever seen.’ said Naomi with smile.

‘How did you meet him?’ asked her sister.

‘Well, I was walking on the green fields beside the road. The man was driving a car. You can’t imagine how nice his car was! When he saw me, he stopped the car and asked me an address.’

‘Address! What address?’

‘Well, it was Jenny’s address. And I told him his destination. While leaving, he told me that.’

‘So what? Why are you so excited? You don’t know anything about the man.’

‘Don’t I know anything?’ said Naomi. ‘I inquired about him from Jenny. The man is a businessman. He’s come here for business with Jenny’s father. And ...’ she paused a while, ‘and ... he is unmarried.’

‘Unmarried!’ Her sister nearly shouted. ‘Why are you so excited that the man is unmarried?’

‘Because... if he proposes to me, I’ll marry him.’

‘What! Will you marry without our parents’ consent?’

‘Haven’t I told you so?’ said Naomi. ‘If the man proposes, I won’t care if our parents disapprove.’

Then without giving Salome chance to ask any questions, Naomi left the room.

What could do Salome? She prayed. That was the thing she used to do.

The next day all the members of the family were present at their living room. Salome informed her parents about Naomi’s intention. The family sat together to discuss the matter. After some dispute, Joe said in a mild tone:

‘Dear Mom, (for he often called his daughters Mom) are you determined to marry that man?’

‘Yes daddy,’ said Naomi. ‘It’s my own life, and I hope you won’t be an obstacle to our union.’

Her father sighed and said again, ‘We love you as God also loves you and everyone. I don’t want to see my daughter in hell. If it isn’t the right choice, you will face hell in this world and the world hereafter.’

‘Daddy, don’t preach your gospel here.’ said Naomi rudely. ‘I’ve heard it so many times.’

Everybody felt sad by the way Naomi was talking and leading her life. Her father didn’t say anything more.

‘But the man isn’t a Christian.’ said Salome.

‘Nor am I.’ Said Naomi smiling. ‘I’m not a Christian according to your Book.’

Then all kept silence. They were afraid to ask any more questions or try to make her understand, lest she would answer in more blasphemous ways.

Two days later Naomi left her parents and sister at night. She left with the man. Her family found a message on the table in the morning. She wrote not to search for her, and she thanked them for raised her up. She also assured them that she would not come back again to disturb them.

They were very sad for the young lady. And the family moved to another city, for it was very dishonorable for a pastor.

Many days passed by. Salome got married and had two sons. Her husband was also a good pastor like her father. Her mother died. Before her death, she told that she knew about Naomi’s departure and she supported her and she was sorry for that. She also confessed to her husband and to God also. Then she died peacefully. Joe was then very old. He lived with his daughter and his days were passing happily with the grandchildren.

On a winter evening Mark (Salome’s husband) was coming home after his visit to one of the families of his church members. He saw a woman sitting under a tree, quivering violently in the cold. She had only summer clothes on, and even they were shabby and worn. He asked her whereabouts but she only opened her lips. The woman was too weak to talk to him. Understanding the awful condition of the woman he took her to his house. Salome nursed the woman. After a few days, the woman was able to talk. The first words she uttered were ‘Oh God! Have pity on my soul.’ And after that she again fell asleep. After a few more days, she could speak clearly for a longer time. Salome asked her name, where she was from, how she came there, and what happened to her. To answer she cried again, ‘Oh, God! Have pity on my soul. It’s my punishment.’ and then she began to cry. When her weeping was over, she said, ‘Oh, why I didn’t wait? I chose the wrong person. He left me. I chose the wrong way.’ and then she again wept.

After a long time when Salome asked her name, she said, “Call me not ..., call me Mara: for the Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me.”

‘Naomi! Is your name Naomi?’ cried Salome. ‘And what is your father’s name? What is your sister’s name?‘ She became very excited.

‘Oh, poor Salome, and Joe, dear father!’ cried the woman.

‘Father, father!’ cried Salome. ‘See, we’ve got Naomi back. Oh, dear sister! Glory is to God. His mercy is forever.’ She was praising God loudly.

Their father came in and Naomi confessed her sin. She said that she had received Christ as her Saviour. She learned to love God through much will and woe.

Then at last the family was reunited. And what a happy union it was! And, of course, Naomi learned to wait for the decisions of God.

Next Guest Post coming in a few days!!

Wanna Write A Guest Post??

2009-11-05T17:00:00.000-08:00

I kind of feel like I've covered most everything I can think of on relationships and all. Feel free to correct me if you think there is still something you'd like to read about, and I'll see what I can do. : ) But I thought I'd get some of y'all to write some guest posts for me. =) I'd like you to tell your stories. Are you courting someone now? Have you dated someone? Are you married? Or are you like me, and have never really been in a relationship? Whatever it may be, I know we'd ALL love to read it! : ) I'd LOVE to get a bunch of posts and do a few weeks of guest posts...but that all depends on how many of y'all are willing to do this!!

So please leave a comment letting me know if you'd like to write for me...and then AS SOON AS POSSIBLE email me your post! I only say 'as soon as possible' because I'd like to start posting as soon as possible. : )

My email is katemarie03@gmail.com and just type "Guest Post" in the subject line so I'll know what it is.

Can't wait to hear from y'all!! =) =) =)

Book Discussion - Before You Meet Prince Charming

2009-10-29T16:53:00.000-07:00

As most of you know, I could go on and on about this book! I don't think I have ever read it without God teaching me something thru it. It is for young ladies, but I think most of the principles in it can be applied to young men as well. It is basically a book to encourage young ladies to wait on God for their spouse and not to go with the worlds way and date around. Most of y'all have probably read this, at least the young ladies might have. But since I would like this to be a discussion, I'm not going to say much about it because I'll never stop if I get started. ; )

So what are your thoughts on it? Is there some one thing that really stuck out to you or was there something you didn't like about it? Come on now, spill it! : )

Sorry

2009-10-25T19:10:00.000-07:00

I am so sorry for my lack of posting lately! I didn't even post all that much on my other blog. But I am planning to get back to it very soon. I am hoping to have a post on here for y'all sometime this week. Maybe a book discussion... : )

Chaperon . . . Yes or No?

2009-10-14T21:08:00.000-07:00

I'm planning on taking a break from the modesty posts for a while. I'm just not quite sure what I want to do next and I don't want to post until I have clear leading on it. But don't worry, we'll get back to it. : )

Now, back to our title . . . What is your opinion on chaperoning? Let me tell you what I believe and then you can do the same if you' like. : ) First off, a double date is NOT chaperoned. And when I say 'date' in this post, I do mean time you spend together while courting (whether its an evening out or in). I am not taking about 'dating' like the world uses it. But a lot of people will consider a double date as a chaperoned date. Well, it isn't. The dictionary defines 'Chaperon' as "An older person who for propriety accompanies young unmarried people." So you going out with another young courting couple really isn't a chaperoned date. But I believe it is fine for a young courting couple to go out with a married couple. It will give you a chance to ask them about marriage and their relationship, and will help you as a couple. Also, I don't believe its right for a younger sibling to chaperon. An older sibling may be fine for somethings, but when it comes to wanting to go out for a more formal type date, I think going with a married couple would be best. Now, I'm not saying it has to be your parents. In all honesty, I think it would be hard to relax if it was always with my parents, but I can think of several married couples in our church that I would love to have chaperon for my future husband and I some day.

Okay, so I went on for a but there, but it is in no way the longest post I've done. lol : ) So what are your thoughts on Chaperoning? Yes or No?

My Guidelines For Modesty

2009-10-09T20:13:00.000-07:00

I believe that a woman should dress modesty and feminine. Now the Bible gives great help in talking about modesty and femininity. And the book 'Dressing for the Lord' by Bro. David Cloud is great for explaining and understanding what the Bible says. I still plan to do a post using that book, but a friend still has it. So I thought I'd go ahead and do this post. Some of y'all asked what my personal guidelines for modesty are, and I'd love to tell you. I'm going to try and explain why as well, but if I don't explain it well then just let me know. : ) First, I'm going to basically be telling what I believe is modest for a lady, or what I wear. Then I'll try to explain what I believe is right for a guy.

I do not believe that there is such a thing as a modest pair of pants or shorts, so I don't wear them. To say I only wear skirts and dresses leaves a bit too much room because there are more immodest skirts made then there are modest ones. I believe a skirt/dress should be loose, long, and flowing. Long being at least below the knee, but I wear mine almost to my ankle if not touching it. A long and flowing skirt covers, and in a sense hides, what is not meant to be seen by anyone but your spouse. And pants don't, they may not show skin but they show the outline of your body. As far as shirts, I believe they should also not be tight, see thru, or low cut. Once again, a loose and modest shirt will be covering/hiding what is not meant to been seen. As far as pajamas, well I have a hard time with this. I know many people wear pajama pants or shorts, and in the privacy of your own bedroom that's fine. But I don't believe its right for me to wear pants or shorts unless they are under a skirt that is just as long as I would normally wear or if the nightgown is as long as a skirt. I wear pants under my skirts most all the time in the winter, and in the summer I will sometimes wear shorts under my skirt if I feel it's needed for something I'm doing. Now for my really weird spot... :) Culottes. Of all the styles and kinds of culottes I have seen or owned over the years, I can only think of two that were truly modest. I own one pair now that really does look like a skirt and even when walking you can't tell that it isn't. And I don't mind wearing them. But most of the time culottes just look like a baggy pair or shorts, and shorts are not modest for a lady. I could probably keep going on naming things I do and don't wear, but when it comes down to it, I really just have to look in the mirror and ask God if it is modest or not. Do I look like a Christian young lady or am I trying to show off my body? Am I going to have a good testimony for the guys around me or are my clothes going to distract them? Am I pleasing God or Satan?

Now for the guys. The way our world is today, it isn't just the girls who are trying to show off their bodies, the guys are doing it too. Well, I guess what I believe about the ladies pretty much fits for guys too. Modest pants for a guy should not be tight, and shorts should be below the knee. Shirts should not be tight or see thru. And this thing about guys taking their shirts off in the heat or something...that is not modest. If it is immodest for a girl to have her shirt off then it's immodest for a guy too.

It's not just about what items of clothing you wear, but the style too. BUT, I'll get into that in the next post on modesty because if I start now I'll never finish this thing! lol I know I have some rather different views on this but it's what God has convicted my heart about. Don't base your convictions off of mine or even your parents (tho you do need to obey theirs while in their house). You have to go before God and ask him to show you what is right for you. For years I lived by my dad's standards for modesty and doing just what he asked of me. When I finally asked God to show me what he wanted for me, it all changed. I have a much better understanding of modesty and these are no longer my dad's standards, they are mine.

Modesty & Dress

2009-10-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd go ahead and post a few things about modesty and dress standards. I am planning a few more posts on the subject, including what I believe the bible says and my personal standards on dress. So y'all can either look forward to or dread those posts. (lol jk ;)

This is basically a list of ten things to consider as you think about your clothing and how you dress. Not just when your thinking about your relationships but also just in your every day life. When you stand in front of your mirror in the morning, think about whether your clothes fit into these things.

1. Please the Lord Jesus Christ and honor Him above all. So many of our dress standards are to please us or please others. Why not please God? 1 Corinthians 10:31 says, "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God."

2. Submit to the biblical principle of modesty. I think this is more of a problem for ladies then it is for guys. Guys are very 'sight oriented' so there are a lot of things that are rather immodest and provocative that you as a lady may not realize. We'll get into this more in one of my next posts. But remember 1Timothy 2:9..."In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel..."

3. Submit to the biblical principle of appropriateness and to identify with godliness. Philippians 4:5 says "Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand." The word moderation means appropriateness. Make sure your clothes are not only modest but also appropriate for what your doing. Like nice dressy clothes for church and your more causal clothes for work. You should have a higher respect for the things of God then you do for work or school, so dress nicer.

4. Promote an environment of purity and spiritual growth. Sadly, our generation is more sexually educated, active, and tempted then EVER before in American history. We should be committed to keeping and pure and godly atmosphere with our friends -- and that means dressing modesty and appropriately. The fact is, how we dress contributes to our environments with friends, at school, and at church.

5. Honor the convictions of your parents. Don't push things to the borderline of "How short/tight/low-cut can I get and still make it past mom and dad?" You should be willing to obey your parents standards as long as you are in there house. I used to just wear modest clothes because its what my dad asked of me...now I have tighter standards for myself as far as dress goes. I'll get into that in another post tho.

6. Give account to the Lord with joy. This is a hard one! 2 Corinthians 5:10 says "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad." Do you want to give account for good or bad choices in clothing?

7. Promote a spirit of maturity. Maturity isn't age, it is the acceptance of responsibility. The sooner you over come those fashion-conscious insecurities, the more mature and responsible you'll be. 1 Corinthians 13:11 says "When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things." Also God commands us to be an example in 1 Timothy 4:12 "Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity."

8. Exemplify a distinct lifestyle not conformed to the world. Romans 12:2 says "And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." God does not want us to fit in or blend in with the world. We are to look different, act different, and BE different. Don't let your clothes say that you're are trying to 'fit in' with the world.

9. Protect the thoughts of those around you. When you dress modestly you are saying that you value yourself as God does. You are broadcasting you commitment to purity. You are saying to others "Think purely about me!" You will be protecting their hearts and minds and displaying responsibility and respect.

10. Be a clear witness of the gospel. If you are dressing different from the world, you are shining brightly! God told us that men look on the outward, so let the outward look different! I can't tell you how many times as a little kid I saw my dad witness to someone because the first notice how his wife and daughter were dressed. Dressing modestly can be an amazing testimony for you!

If you dress in a way that honors the Lord, your relationships will benefit from that as well!

**Some material taken from 'Just Friends' by Mike Ray and Cary Schmidt**

Meeting The Right Guy/Girl...

2009-09-29T12:33:00.000-07:00

I was reading over some of the resources I have on relationships and came across the articles on Momof9splace.com. I have them on the side bar, so y'all can take a look at those if you want. But this is part of the 4th paper. We always talk about trusting God and going with the idea of courting rather then dating...but I think we all wonder how that will happen. I have done a post on the process of courting before, but have you ever wondered what we can to meet a guy or girl? Yes we do need to trust God, but I believe God wants us to do our part too. This is just a few things to help us out a bit. : )

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

1. Pray and submit yourself to God. Over 80% of all young women want to be married and have a family. You are probably part of the 80%. God wants most young men and women to be married and have a family. Therefore, pray about it. Submit yourself to God and His Word, seek His counsel and pray for Him to lead you to that special one. Then rest in His wisdom and mercy by faith.

2. Widen your circle of opportunities. Be faithful to the services of your home church, but go to as many camp meetings, youth camps, mission trips, and Gospel meetings as you can, not only for their spiritual benefit, but to meet other Christian young people. We have had a number of young couples meet at such places in the last few years. Moreover, God can bring young people of similar interests and backgrounds together at such places. We have had one couple meet on a mission trip to Mexico, several at camp meetings and one at a young adult fellowship.

3. Accept introductions. If some sincere brother or sister in the Lord says to you, "There is someone I would like you to meet," unless it is something other than awkwardness, shyness or embarrassment, accept the invitation. We have had numbers of young couples meet that way. It works! Seek introductions. If there is someone you want to meet, seek an introduction through a third party. It is discreet, polite and effective.

4. Secure the blessings of the parents. Your parents have first and final approval on all the people you are likely to be romantically involved with. Talk it over with them before you get involved. Seek their counsel, approval and blessing. The young man should introduce the young lady to his parents. If further progress is made, the parents should meet and get acquainted.

5. Seek your pastor's advice. Before you get too serious, seek your pastor's advice. Pastors often know things even parents do not know. Moreover, most couples seek premarital counseling after the wedding arrangements are already made. It is often too late. I speak from sad experience.

Isaac and Rebekah's Courtship

2009-09-25T10:03:00.000-07:00

I LOVE to read this chapter! One of the greatest stories of courtship in the Bible! So I thought I'd post it for y'all to read. : ) I know its a bit long, but I think it's important to know how God wants a courtship to be. You will notice that Isaac's father had more to do with the courtship that just advising, he was a huge part of it! And I also love how Rebekah covered her face when she saw Isaac...even then she knew it was important to be modest before her future husband. I also like where it says she 'lighted off' the camel...I guess she was a bit excited huh? ; ) Well, I hope y'all enjoy reading this, and please leave a comment with any thoughts you might have. : )

^{Genesis 24}

¹And Abraham was old, and well stricken in age: and the LORD had blessed Abraham in all things.²And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house, that ruled over all that he had, Put, I pray thee, thy hand under my thigh. ³And I will make thee swear by the LORD, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell:⁴But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son Isaac.⁵And the servant said unto him, Peradventure the woman will not be willing to follow me unto this land: must I needs bring thy son again unto the land from whence thou camest?⁶And Abraham said unto him, Beware thou that thou bring not my son thither again.⁷The LORD God of heaven, which took me from my father's house, and from the land of my kindred, and which spake unto me, and that sware unto me, saying, Unto thy seed will I give this land; he shall send his angel before thee, and thou shalt take a wife unto my son from thence.⁸And if the woman will not be willing to follow thee, then thou shalt be clear from this my oath: only bring not my son thither again.⁹And the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master, and sware to him concerning that matter.¹⁰And the servant took ten camels of the camels of his master, and departed; for all the goods of his master were in his hand: and he arose, and went to Mesopotamia, unto the city of Nahor.¹¹And he made his camels to kneel down without the city by a well of water at the time of the evening, even the time that women go out to draw water.¹²And he said O LORD God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham.¹³Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water:¹⁴And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master.¹⁵And it came to pass, before he had done speaking, that, behold, Rebekah came out, who was born to Bethuel, son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, with her pitcher upon her shoulder.¹⁶And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up.¹⁷And the servant ran to meet her, and said, Let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of thy pitcher.¹⁸And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon her hand, and gave him drink.¹⁹And when she had done giving him drink, she said, I will draw water for thy camels also, until they have done drinking.²⁰And she hasted, and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw water, and drew for all his camels.²¹And the man wondering at her held his peace, to wit whether the LORD had made his journey prosperous or not.²²And it came to pass, as the camels had done drinking, that the man took a golden earring of half a shekel weight, and two bracelets for her hands of ten shekels weight of gold;²³And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room in thy father's house for us to lodge in?²⁴And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor.²⁵She said moreover unto him, We have both straw and provender enough, and room to lodge in.²⁶And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the LORD.²⁷And he said, Blessed be the LORD God of my master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my master of his mercy and his truth: I being in the way, the LORD led me to the house of my master's brethren.²⁸And the damsel ran, and told them of her mother's house these things.²⁹And Rebekah had a brother, and his name was Laban: and Laban ran out unto the man, unto the well.³⁰And it came to pass, when he saw the earring and bracelets upon his sister's hands, and when he heard the words of Rebekah his sister, saying, Thus spake the man unto me; that he came unto the man; and, behold, he stood by the camels at the well.³¹And he said, Come in, thou blessed of the LORD; wherefore standest thou without? for I have prepared the house, and room for the camels.³²And the man came into the house: and he ungirded his camels, and gave straw and provender for the camels, and water to wash his feet, and the men's feet that were with him.³³And there was set meat before him to eat: but he said, I will not eat, until I have told mine errand. And he said, Speak on.³⁴And he said, I am Abraham's servant.³⁵And the LORD hath blessed my master greatly; and he is become great: and he hath given him flocks, and herds, and silver, and gold, and menservants, and maidservants, and camels, and asses.³⁶And Sarah my master's wife bare a son to my master when she was old: and unto him hath he given all that he hath.³⁷And my master made me swear, saying, Thou shalt not take a wife to my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, in whose land I dwell:³⁸But thou shalt go unto my father's house, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son.³⁹And I said unto my master, Peradventure the woman will not follow me.⁴⁰And he said unto me, The LORD, before whom I walk, will send his angel with thee, and prosper thy way; and thou shalt take a wife for my son of my kindred, and of my father's house:⁴¹Then shalt thou be clear from this my oath, when thou comest to my kindred; and if they give not thee one, thou shalt be clear from my oath.⁴²And I came this day unto the well, and said, O LORD God of my master Abraham, if now thou do prosper my way which I go:⁴³Behold, I stand by the well of water; and it shall come to pass, that when the virgin cometh forth to draw water, and I say to her, Give me, I pray thee, a little water of thy pitcher to drink;⁴⁴And she say to me, Both drink thou, and I will also draw for thy camels: let the same be the woman whom the LORD hath appointed out for my master's son.⁴⁵And before I had done speaking in mine heart, behold, Rebekah came forth with her pitcher on her shoulder; and she went down unto the well, and drew water: and I said unto her, Let me drink, I pray thee.⁴⁶And she made haste, and let down her pitcher from her shoulder, and said, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: so I drank, and she made the camels drink also.⁴⁷And I asked her, and said, Whose daughter art thou? And she said, the daughter of Bethuel, Nahor's son, whom Milcah bare unto him: and I put the earring upon her face, and the bracelets upon her hands.⁴⁸And I bowed down my head, and worshipped the LORD, and blessed the LORD God of my master Abraham, which had led me in the right way to take my master's brother's daughter unto his son.⁴⁹And now if ye will deal kindly and truly with my master, tell me: and if not, tell me; that I may turn to the right hand, or to the left.⁵⁰Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, The thing proceedeth from the LORD: we cannot speak unto thee bad or good.⁵¹Behold, Rebekah is before thee, take her, and go, and let her be thy master's son's wife, as the LORD hath spoken.⁵²And it came to pass, that, when Abraham's servant heard their words, he worshipped the LORD, bowing himself to the earth.⁵³And the servant brought forth jewels of silver, and jewels of gold, and raiment, and gave them to Rebekah: he gave also to her brother and to her mother precious things.⁵⁴And they did eat and drink, he and the men that were with him, and tarried all night; and they rose up in the morning, and he said, Send me away unto my master.⁵⁵And her brother and her mother said, Let the damsel abide with us a few days, at the least ten; after that she shall go.⁵⁶And he said unto them, Hinder me not, seeing the LORD hath prospered my way; send me away that I may go to my master.⁵⁷And they said, We will call the damsel, and enquire at her mouth.⁵⁸And they called Rebekah, and said unto her, Wilt thou go with this man? And she said, I will go.⁵⁹And they sent away Rebekah their sister, and her nurse, and Abraham's servant, and his men.⁶⁰And they blessed Rebekah, and said unto her, Thou art our sister, be thou the mother of thousands of millions, and let thy seed possess the gate of those which hate them.⁶¹And Rebekah arose, and her damsels, and they rode upon the camels, and followed the man: and the servant took Rebekah, and went his way.⁶²And Isaac came from the way of the well Lahairoi; for he dwelt in the south country.⁶³And Isaac went out to meditate in the field at the eventide: and he lifted up his eyes, and saw, and, behold, the camels were coming.⁶⁴And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she lighted off the camel.⁶⁵For she had said unto the servant, What man is this that walketh in the field to meet us? And the servant had said, It is my master: therefore she took a vail, and covered herself.⁶⁶And the servant told Isaac all things that he had done.⁶⁷And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death.

A Lot On My Heart...

2009-09-22T19:56:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess I don't really have a topic for this post. But I do have a LOT on my heart and I just thought I'd go ahead and share it with y'all. Hopefully y'all can make sense of it. I normally would put a post like this on my other blog, but it fits more with what we've been talking about on here. Sharon did give me a great idea to do some posts on modesty and such. I plan to do that soon, but I'm waiting for a book before I start. I think modesty does indeed have a HUGE impact on guy/girl relationships...but we'll get into that another time. : )

You know, as much as I wholeheartedly believe that the right way to go about a relationship is to fully wait on God, I still have times when I get rather discouraged and find the waiting even harder then normal. I see the teenagers around me pairing off and here's Katie...still waiting. I'm sure most of it is just a lack of faith, but that doesn't make it any easier. I have heard a lot of stories about how people of struggled with this and as soon as they've given the whole thing to God, they started to see God work in that area. Part of me says I already gave all that up, but another part of me knows that if I have really given it all to God then I shouldn't be struggling so much. I know I've still got some things to work on, but I pray that God helps me do that very soon. : )

I got a book for my birthday from a very dear little friend called 'The Princess and the kiss'. It's a children's book, but it has a very powerful truth in it. It's a fairy tale about a princess and how she saves her first kiss for the right person and right time. It was very cute, but also really encouraging. God has used a lot of little things like that to encourage me lately. Also, I'm thinking about starting a journal of letters for my future husband. I love to write, and I think maybe it might help me to write my thought about this time of waiting down for my future spouse to one day read. I'm not sure yet. Have any of you ever written letters to your future spouse? I'd like to hear your thoughts on it if you have. : )

I hope you don't mind my rambling for a minute...I'll be sure to get back to some 'normal' posts soon. : )

Not Quite Sure Yet...

2009-09-20T20:37:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been so long since I've really posted much...I'm just not sure what to talk about next. I have had a few thoughts, but just haven't had peace about them. I'm kind of just wanting for God to give me inspiration on whats next...or peace on one of the ideas I've already had. So if y'all have any thoughts or ideas of what you'd like to read about next, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE feel free to leave a comment. This is y'all's blog too...so you tell me what you'd like to read and learn about and I'll certainly pray about it.

DVD Review - "To Be One"

2009-09-13T20:18:00.001-07:00

This movie was incredibly encouraging to me. I love how even tho it was three different stories, they were still very God honoring. It just goes to show that not every story of courtship is going to be the same but that doesn't mean that there is only one right way to do it.

I have to say that I thought the first wedding was rather cute and romantic. I loved how the groom had a cape and sword and the bride had a princess-like wedding gown. It was a very cool wedding! I'd have to say that it got me rethinking my 'dream wedding'. : )

The second story was very encouraging! it was so cool how the couple knew that God wanted them to marry and they both committed to marry before they even fell in love. Such an amazing example of fully trusting God in your courtship and marriage.

The third story was great too. It was a bit more modern and more 'down to earth' then the other two. But I think that is probably a help to those who are still a bit unsure of what courtship is and how it should be done.

All in all, I'd say it's a great movie for everyone to watch! You can find it on the website here - www.tobeonevideo.com

Becoming the Right Person VS. Trying to Find the Right Person

2009-09-04T15:34:00.001-07:00

I think we often think more about finding the right person then we do about becoming the right person. Finding the 'perfect' spouse is not going to make you the 'perfect' spouse too. We need to work on becoming the right person before we spend too much time thinking about finding the right person. Ephesians 5 is a great chapter to read for some help with this. It is a great chapter about marriage but before the Holy Spirit ever talks about how to be a good husband or wife, He says "Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children; And walk in love..." (Eph.5:1-2) The chapter talks about being the right person--walking in light, understanding God's will, redeeming our time, being filled with the Holy Spirit. So before He talks about being a good spouse, He says to follow God as dear children and walk in love. He's telling us to look to Him as a young child looks to their father. Do you remember when you were young and you just thought that Daddy was the coolest? Well, he wants us to think of God like that. Meaning, God holds all of your hopes and dreams--He is your everything! God should be the center of your life, not a boyfriend or girlfriend. So many times when people 'Christian date', they end up replacing God with their current boyfriend or girlfriend. And that's not right! Your spouse should not replace God at all, you should be able to love Him and live for him right along side them. So lets stop looking for the right person and focus more on becoming the right person.

Why is this so important? Well, lets compare the two a bit. : ) The worlds model: trying to find the right person. God's model: becoming the right person.

Becoming the right person places your hope in God. ~ Trying to find the right person places your hope in another person.
Becoming the right person focuses on God's work in you. ~ Trying to find the right person prevents God's work in you.
Becoming the right person make your patient. ~ Trying to find the right person makes you impatient.
Becoming the right person makes you strong. ~ Trying to find the right person makes you weak.
Becoming the right person makes you spiritual. ~ Trying to find the right person make you self-centered and carnal.
Becoming the right person settles your emotions. ~ Trying to find the right person confuses your emotions.
Becoming the right person make you want to stay pure. ~ Trying to find the right person tempts you to lose your purity.
Becoming the right person seeks love and acceptance from God. ~ Trying to find the right person seeks love and acceptance from people.
Becoming the right person will lead you to the right person. ~ Trying to find the right person will lead you astray.

Even the bible has an example of both models...look up the story of Isaac & Rebekah and Samson & Delilah. Which one would you rather have? It's kind of a no-brainer. God's way is always best. It's that simple. : )

**Some material taken from 'Just Friends' by Mike Ray and Cary Schmidt**

"The Princess Adelina"

2009-08-31T18:10:00.000-07:00

Well, I just read this book today and it was very good! So I thought we could do a bit of a book discussion on here. :-) Now, I know you guys probably haven't read this, so I figured y'all can give your thoughts on whatever us ladies decide to say about it. :-) So first I'm just gonna tell y'all what I liked best about it.

The whole book is great! But let me explain what I liked best. In the beginning when Adelina first met Gisilhar, they were both attracted to one another. And it gives you the idea that Adelina was often thinking about this free lord and she had dreams of marriage just like any other girl would. But she doesn't end up married to him, and you notice that those thoughts and dreams about Gisilhar in the past caused some trouble in her marriage later. For me, it kind of reminded me once again just how important it is to keep your emotions in check and watch our thoughts about guys/girls. In the book, Hedan (Adelina's husband) was very jealous of what he saw, or thought he saw between Adelina and Gisilhar. And It's not very much farther in the story before Adelina realizes that Gisilhar is not who she thought he was. I guess even the best of us can be blinded by emotions, but just think of how much smoother our marriages would be if we didn't have to deal with all kinds of emotional baggage from our past.

All in all, it was a great book and I loved it! Please comment with any thoughts or questions. If y'all enjoy doing this book discussion, I'll start doing them more often with some other great books on relationships. :-)

Emotional Purity...

2009-08-26T20:27:00.000-07:00

I know I already posted on Emotional purity on my other blog about a month or two ago, but I wanted to post about it again for a few reasons. 1) I don't think you will ever stop needing encouragement in this area. 2) I want it to be on this blog as well. 3) God placed it on my heart again this week, so I want to follow his leading and go over it again. So I'm going to start by posting a small part out of "Before you meet Prince Charming" by Sarah Mally, but I am going to change it so that it will fit for both guys and girls. :-)

Emotional Purity is hardly even considered possible in our present society. But think of it this way: How would your future spouse feel if they knew that some other guy/girl had known your deepest thoughts, dreams, fears, and emotions? What would they think if some other person had known you even better than he/she knows you? Or how would you like if some other guy/girl had dozens of long, deep, intimate conversations with your spouse and knew practically everything there was to know about him/her? Save all your "firsts" not just your first "kiss". Some people think casually and think they might be having fun now but how will that affect their marriages later? A list of some meaningful "firsts" that could happen and should be shared with that special someone:

First expression of interest

First words of affection or love

First gift given or received

First romantic look into his eyes

First trip together

First special song, place, event, or memory

First ring

First dinner date

First personal letter expressing emotions

First "I love you"

First piece of your heart given

First serious or ongoing correspondence with a young man or woman

First special affectionate nicknames or actions

First kiss

That is not a list of rules but a list to make you think. Many young people seem to want to get close to the line as possible and still remain pure. But looking at the big picture of our lives ought to motivate us to have the opposite perspective. The question is how much can I save for him/her, how many little special and meaningful "firsts" will I have to share with him/her? It is not that we are merely trying to avoid the worst, but rather that we desire to archive the best!

I believe that emotional purity is just as important as physical purity, but so much harder to do! The smallest thought that is not pure will continue to grow and in the end that thought will take you so much farther then you ever realized. We need to be so careful of guarding our minds! Have you ever thought about some of the movies and music that parents hand to their teenagers? And then they act so surprised when they find out that their 16 year old daughter is pregnant. Country music is a good example...not only is the music ungodly, but the words are either talking about picking up or breaking up. That is not going to keep your mind pure! Think about the music you listen to, the movies you watch, and the books you read...do they ALL honor and glorify God or are you having to struggle to keep your mind from thinking on the wrong things?

Okay, so I got off on a rabbit trail there, but I hope we as young adults can understand just how important this is. Not only can movies, music, and books ruin our emotional purity...but thinking about a certain guy/girl too much can do the same thing. I don't care if you're already engaged to the person, you still need to keep your thoughts about them pure until your married. And learning how to do that now will help you stay faithful to your spouse later. Just because you have a crush on a guy/girl doesn't mean its okay to have wrong thoughts about them. People often say its normal to have a crush and to leave it alone. Well, yes...it is normal, but that doesn't mean it should be left alone. I don't think it should be encouraged at all, but those young people need to learn to control their thoughts and emotions. Believe me, I know it's a lot easier said then done. Let me just say this again so I'm clear...It is very normal for someone to be attracted to someone and to have a crush. BUT...that is not a reason to let your thoughts run wild! Instead of thinking about him/her all of the time, pray about it. Now, don't go and pray "God, please let me marry him/her! Please!!" but why not try something like this "Lord, please be with him/her and guide and direct both of our lives. Help me to keep a pure heart and mind, and guard and keep my heart until you show me the right person." I realize that there is nothing wrong with praying for things we want, but I think when we pray for God's will, we end up realizing that his will is what we wanted all along.

Arranged Marriage?

2009-08-21T18:27:00.000-07:00

You know, when I was younger I often thought courtship was just a way for parents to arrange a marriage for their children. I just really didn't know what courtship was, now that I have a greater understanding of it I realized that it is an arranged marriage. Only it's arranged by God Almighty, and that is just fine by me. I think God can pick a far better husband for me then my parents or I could. :-) But even knowing that, don't you kind of wonder just when, where, and how you'll meet and get to know your spouse? I do! Now, I know that at least all of the girls will know where I'm coming from (considering girls tend to "dream" a bit more then guys do. lol), but I honestly find myself wondering how this will happen. Lets try and figure this out a bit. :-)

We know from movies and such that out in the world, it pretty much always starts with physical attraction. But I think we know that isn't the right way. The world goes Body, Soul, and then maybe Spirit. So if your not just going to fall in love with a guy/girl by what his/her body is then how? Well, I believe God intends it to be Spirit, Soul, and then Body.

Now, I'm not saying that your shouldn't be physical attracted to your future spouse. You should and will be, but that is not the most important part. The joining together of two people in marriage needs to happen in the proper order: Spiritual first, physical last. That is why I say no touching until after marriage. Your heart and soul should be invested in the other person long before your body ever is.

Here is an example of how your courtship might go. Lets just say this is how I pray it will work out for me. :-)

1) Observe.
-When the Lord brings someone into your path that interests you, your first step is not to show interest or get all excited and go tell your friends. Just watch. In my post "A rather interesting thought" I gave a list of some questions, use that list when watch the guy/girl. You can learn a lot about someone character by just watching them.

2) Acquainted as Casual Friends.
-If God wants to bring two people together, He will give opportunities for them to get to know each other in natural settings. Such as church, school, work, common friendships, camps, or ministries. God doesn't need anyone else to play "matchmaker", he does a good job of that himself. :-) You'll learn more about a person by watching and being around them in real life then you ever would on a date. Anyone can be sweet and kind on a date but that doesn't mean thats who they really are.

3) Young Man takes initiative.
-Guys: I know I've said this before, but don't go the the girl first, go the her Daddy. Or even talk to your Daddy and let him go to her Daddy before you do. I know of a lot of couples who have done that and it has worked out really well. Either way, if you have prayed about it and know that God wants you to start a relationship with this young lady then it's your move. You have to take the initiative here.
-Girls: Yes, I know this is the part where you're either crying cause your so happy or jumping for joy! ;-) But before you let your emotions get too involved, this is the time when your parents should get to know the young man a little better. Ask him questions and such. But if the young man meets "Daddy's qualifications" then its a good time for the two families to get to know each other better.

4) Close Friendship
-Now, this is when you are really getting to know each other. You might email, text, phone calls, dinner's with family, or what ever else. But you will not make it thru this part if you don't have convictions of your own. This is the time when your flesh is going to try and run you, but in order to keep a pure mind and body you must have strong convictions that will keep your flesh from taking over. Don't let this just be a time when your just being together, let be a time of doing together. Serve together in ministries so that you know that you will be able to serve God side by side. Also, use this time to discuss important subjects such as: your purpose in life, your future ministry goals, your doctrine, your convictions, your views on family and child raising, and your spiritual walk. It is still best to avoid intimate talks until you are engaged.

5) Engagement.
-Many long talks have already occurred, but now are some of the most special times and a greater level of intimacy (not physical) as you enjoy the feeling of belonging to one another. You are about to be married to one another, so you will need a lot of time to talk. BUT, you still need to be careful not to put yourselves into tempting situations. I know some couples will hug, kiss, and hold hands when they are engaged, but I strongly recommend waiting. It would be so much more special if the first time you hold hands is when your in front of the church on that day and if your first kiss was at the wedding alter.

6) Marriage.
-For now, I'm only going to give one thought here: Our purpose for getting married should not be to get, but rather to give. We can be sure that if we follow God's plan for this relationship, it will bring us such fulfillment and joy.

Remember: God has a plan that goes beyond what we can imagine, so just trust Him.

"Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen."
Ephesians 3:20-21

*Some material is taken from "Before you meet Prince Charming" by Sarah Mally and "Just Friends" by Cary Schmidt and Mike Ray*

**Feel free to leave any thoughts you have. I would love to get a discussion going with y'all. :-)**

Why "No Touch"?

2009-08-17T18:11:00.000-07:00

People often ask me "Well, why can't you even hold a guys hand?" Well, to tell you the truth, I can do whatever I want...but just because I can do something doesn't mean its right or that I even want to. When asked this, I always gave 1 Corin. 7:1. And I still stand by that. BUT...I never really knew how to explain it and not be too blunt. Well, I read a book a few months ago called "Just Friends" by Mike Ray and Cary Schmidt. The book is more for the younger teenager, meaning that it encourages you to not worry about a dating type of relationship yet and to just be friends. Where as, when you reach a level of maturity (and I'm not saying age, because I know some 12 year olds that are much more mature then some 20 year olds!) that you feel God does indeed want you to marry, well there are somethings to consider and pray about that a 13 year old really doesn't need to focus on yet. But even at that age, you should still focus on a friendship first. Your spouse should be your very best friend, so why not work on the friend part before your married? I would encourage any young teenager to read that book, and even the older ones too.

Now back to my topic, I loved the two chapters on "no touch" in the book!! Okay, so lets start with this...you may have already decided that your first kiss will be on your wedding day, if so great! But you don't think there is anything wrong with holding hands or hugging...let me just say, if you give an inch, it will go a mile! I'm not saying that physical affection is a bad thing, its a very good thing. BUT, its something God intended for marriage, and marriage only. And for that reason, I don't believe any touching should be done until the wedding day, not even during engagement. See, a physical relationship is a special and important thing, but that is not the marriage. Yes, its a important part, but being physical never held a marriage together. Being physical is an expression of what holds a marriage together. This is how they explain it in the book: "In marriage, commitment and character are like the steel girders of a skyscraper --what the walls and finishings hold to. The physical act of marriage is supposed to be supported by the steel structure of commitment and integrity." So if God is still building your foundation, you'll be ruining it by being physical before marriage. And by showing you have the self control and are faithful to your future spouse enough to wait, you are proving to your spouse that you will also be faithful in the marriage. If you can't control your desires and save yourself for one person, how are you going to be faithful to one person once your married?

Okay, I know I've went on for a while (and I could probably keep going...lol) but I just want to share this last thought with your before I go.
Guys: If you touch a girl, you think she's experiencing the same surface pleasure you are, but thats not so. She's investing her heart in you, and since your not married, you don't own her heart, or her body. Keeping your hands off a girl show great respect for her heart, her Daddy, her God, and her future husband (even if its you!).
Girls: Unless a guy is committing himself to you at a wedding alter, he doesn't own your heart. Therefore, physical touch is not love, its just physical pleasure. He may tell you his heart is invested too, but know this: a guy who will take advantage of your body before marriage does not really love you.

Saving your body and guarding your heart now, will make you a much better spouse later!

Blog Award

2009-08-13T19:31:00.001-07:00

Jennifer over at God's Been Good awarded this blog a pretty blog award. :-) Thanks Jennifer! Now, I have to list 7 things you might not know about me, and then choose 7 friends to give the award to. :-) Now, I'm not going to make a habit of doing posts like this on this blog, but I thought it'd be okay once in awhile. So hopefully y'all don't mind, and I will still post again in a few days.

First, the 7 things about me...(this is gonna be hard. lol)

1) I hate water. lol Water games, rides, and swimming have never made sense to me, just seems like a big waste of time. :-)

2) I listen to and sing Christmas music as early as October. I always try to wait until after Thanksgiving (which is my favorite holiday), but I don't like only getting to listen to and sing that music for a month. :-) Such great songs, and we never listen to them past December.

3) This one may be a surprise, seeing as I write all of the time...but I don't talk much. :-) I talk to my family, but other then them, you'll have a hard time getting me to really talk. I'm good at listening tho. ;-)

4) I LOVE books!! Oh, wait you probably knew that one already. ;-)

5) Umm, I'm turning 19 in about a month. Which I honestly am having a hard time believing. Seems like I just turned 18.

6) Oh, we are going to North Carolina for vacation in Sept. To the beach! We're leaving the day after my birthday. What an awesome b-day present! :-)

7) Aside from my family, my cousin Joe was probably the best friend I ever had growing up. With him being here to visit, we have gotten a ton of chances to talk about the time we spent together growing up. Even he said that we were their best friends, just as much as they were ours. All those years of thinking I had no friends, and here the best one I had was right in front of my face. :-) Shows how much I paid attention. lol

Okay...now for the people I want to award.

1) Rebecca at "A Rather Unusual Maiden for God"

2) Rachel at "HopeJourney"

3) Amber at "JoyfulHomemaker"

4) Jennifer at "Maiden in Waiting"

5) Sharon at "My Delightful Diary"

6) Ginger at "Pieces Of My Heart"

7) Becca at "Virtuous Daughters"

A Rather Interesting Thought

2009-08-11T17:17:00.000-07:00

I am often ask "Well, what would you if a guy asked you out?" In all honestly, since I've never been "asked out", I wouldn't know. And I honestly don't want to be "asked out"...why do people call it that anyways?? "Going out"? Where? I don't believe in dating anyways, so I hope the right guy has the same standard and would be asking to court me, not just go out on a casual dinner date. All that said, what should a girl do when a guy asks to date or court them? And how should guys go about doing that? Well, let me give y'all some Do's and Don't's.

1) Girls, send him to your father. - Guys, ask her Daddy FIRST!
-Girls: If the guy asks your Dad first, then it will show that he respects you and your parents. And trust me, you want the guy to respect you AND your parents!
-Guys: You need to have respect for her parents, they could be your in-laws someday. And by showing that you respect he an her family, it will increase the respect she has for you. And yes, you want her to respect you as well.

2) Guys, spend some serous time in prayer BEFORE asking her. - Girls, tell him you need to pray about it first, and then PRAY.
-Guys: Don't make this a casual thing, pray and make sure you have God's okay before entering a relationship with this young lady. You could marry this girl, don't make it a light thing.
-Girls: Like I told the guys, it isn't a light things, so don't make it one. If your going to "casual date" then fine, don't pray about it. But if your striving to follow God, it shouldn't be a casual thing...its something that needs a lot of prayer.

3) Girls, just because he's the first one that asks to court you, doesn't mean he is the right guy. Guys, just because you think she's pretty doesn't mean shes the one for you.
-Guys/Girls: You shouldn't base the guy or girl you have a relationship with by carnal things. Here are some thing to consider about the guy/girl:

Is he/she a born again Christian?
Does he/she faithfully share the gospel with others?
Is he/she always truthful?
Is he/she committed to NEVER get divorced?
Does he/she honor their parents?
Does he/she have a daily walk with God, such as Bible reading, prayer, memorization, and giving?
Does he/she make all decisions based upon the Word of God?
Would you be happy to have he/she as the parent of your children?
Is he/she diligent in their work, and wise with the use of their money?
Is God calling you in the same direction of ministry?
Is he/she willing to admit a wrong and ask forgiveness?
Is he/she a humble and willing servant?
Is he/she willing to stand for Christ, even if it means standing alone?
Does he/she respond to criticism in a "Christlike" way?
Is he/she kind, thoughtful, and gracious?

You know, girls often have a problem with letting the guy lead, but what these girls don't realize is that we have the easier part. God made Adam first, and then made Eve as a help meet. Two things: Guys, you need to lead...that means you ask the girl, not the other way around. Girls, let him lead! Don't you dare go up to a guy and "ask him out" or ask him to court you! It's not that way God intended it. "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." (Gen. 2:24) See, the guy makes the first move...not the girl. :-)

Okay, I'm done rambling...I just leave you with one more thought. :-) Girls: If you want a great husband, find a guy who is loving and respectful towards his mother. Guys: If you want a great wife, find a girl who is loving and willingly submissive towards her father. (And by "willingly", I mean she enjoys helping and working with/under her father.)

What To Do When God Says "It's Not Time Yet, Just Wait"

2009-08-05T20:34:00.000-07:00

You know, the first thing people think when God tells them to wait is "But Waiting is TOO HARD!!" Well, in all honesty, yes it is. I don't know that God has ever asked anything harder of me, yet I wholeheartedly believe that outcome will be well worth it. No body ever wants to wait for anything anymore...I mean, think about it. If you microwave your food because its faster then cooking on the stove...does the microwaved food EVER taste better then what you cooked on the stove? NO! Or if you get tired of waiting for your clothes to dry so you take them out of the dryer before it buzzes, your going to have damp clothes instead of nice warm dry ones. Well, pretty much everything I can think of turns out better if you wait. Not only that, but if God says wait, why not just trust him and wait.

Here are some consequences we'll face if we don't obey and wait...

1) We miss God's lessons
- God gives us a season of waiting to teach us things, and if we skip past that season we will miss whatever lessons he had to teach us.
2) We miss God's best
- God has the right person already picked out for you, and if you rush things you may end up marrying the wrong person. God wants the very best for you, wait and let him give you that.
3) We miss God's help
- Think about Abraham and Sarah, God had promised them a son but because they took matters into their own hands and didn't want the made a huge mistake the caused a lifetime of trouble. You should want God's help more then you want your own way in these matters.
4) We miss God's opportunities
- You know, by waiting not waiting on God, we miss a great opportunity to be an example to the world. What a testimony to be able to wait and rely on God.

Okay, now that I gave you the bad side of waiting, I'll give you the good points too. :-)

I. You will not be ashamed. (Is.49:23)
II. The Lord will strengthen your heart. (Ps. 27:14)
III. You shall inherit the earth. (Ps. 37:9)
IV. You strength will be renewed. (Is. 40:31)
V. The Lord will be good to you. (Lam. 3:25)

Although waiting is hard, it is necessary. Waiting takes faith. Nobody wants to just sit around and wait, and Gods not asking you to just sit around and do nothing...its more that you need to rest in him and put your complete faith in him. If God's asking you to wait, then ask him to help you wait and give you something to do while you wait. Pour your life into a ministry, into your family, into studying more...whatever your feel God wants you to do, do it with faith! Why trade a lifetime of love for a dollar's worth of pleasure now? God has a plan for your life, don't trade that in for the devil's plan.

A few tips to help you wait...
-Exchange your dreams for something better...God's perfect plan. His plan is real, dreams aren't.
-Consider how awesome our God is, and trust that awesome power.
-Write down at least ten good things that have come while you wait.
-Rejoice in this time of waiting, God has you waiting for a reason so rejoice in Him for it.
-Don't focus in the waiting, focus on the Lord.
-Learn to lean on God for all your daily burdens and needs, it will help you have for trust and faith in him.

I have some verses for y'all to memorize this week...

"For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly. O LORD of hosts, blessed is the man that trusteth in thee." (Psalm 84:11-12)

*Some material is taken from "Before you meet Prince Charming" by Sarah Mally and "Just Friends" by Cary Schmidt and Mike Ray*

Just An Extra Assignment

2009-07-30T10:15:00.000-07:00

Due to the fact that I have family coming in and therefore I am quite busy, I don't have much of a post for y'all this week. But I do have a bit of an assignment, and I would like you to comment and give me the answer please. :-) Don't worry, its not a bad assignment.

Okay, anytime I have studied this with friends, I have had them give me the top five things that are most important in the guy or girl you will marry. It can be anything from a certain talent or quality to a type of ministry. So take a bit of time to think about it, and then comment back with your top five most important things the guy or girl MUST have. See, you didn't have to worry, this is a cool assignment. :-) And I'll even give you my top five things the guy I marry MUST have or be. :-)

1) Strong love for God and the brethren.
2) Faith and confidence in God and his Word.
3) Called into the ministry
4) Compassion
5) Honesty

Please, please comment back...I really want to see what y'all will come up with. Thanks!

Guarding Your Heart

2009-07-25T19:22:00.000-07:00

The heart is more then just emotions. The heart does drive our emotions, but it pretty much drives all we do. What the heart desires is the most powerful force in our lives. Whether it be desiring to go to a certain place, desiring to be with a certain person, or desiring to be a certain way. Whatever your heart desires is going to drive and push your whole life. So we need to make sure to protect and guard our hearts from influences that will pollute or steal our hearts. As young people we are going to be around young people of the other gender, and even though they may all be Christians, we still need to be careful of how we act around them. I don't believe its right when parents or churches think it wrong for young people to be around young people of the other gender. I think there need to be guidelines and I do believe that they should never be alone, but you need to know how to act around guys/girls. It will make your time of courtship a bit uncomfortable if you don't even know how to act around the other gender. All of that said, here are a few ways to help you act right and guard your heart when you are around guys/girls.

1) Keep the friendship casual.
-There are four different levels of friendships: acquaintances, casual friends, close friends, and intimate friends. In order to save you heart for one person and not give it away to the wrong person, friendships with the other gender should stay at the acquaintance or casual friend level. it doesn't take long before you end up too close, you need to be very careful of sharing too much and forming emotional bonds. Even if this is the guy/girl that God has for you, you still need to be careful of giving your heart away sooner then God intends.

2) Avoid situations that will create emotional bonds.
-Basically, don't spend time alone with the guy/girl. If you spend too much time in a one-on-one talk with a guy/girl, your are putting yourself in a situation that can easily cause you to open up a little too much. I'm not saying its a bad thing to have a one-on-one talk with a guy/girl, but just be sure to have others around or not let it get too personal or go on too long.

3) Don't seek attention for yourself.
-I know for a fact that both guys and girls have a way of getting attention and making sure a certain guy/girl sees them. We as Christians need to be careful of that. Its one thing if your appearance or personality gets someones attention, but you really shouldn't be trying to get that persons attention. If you dress and act right around guys/girls, then don't worry about getting someones attention and just trust God to get the right guy or girl's attention.

4) Ask your parents for advice.
- Just remember that they have already went through all of this. Even though you might not think your parents are "cool", they still might be able to help you in this area. :-)

5) Guard your words when your with friends.
- If you have an interest in a certain guy or girl, don't go to your friends and talk about it. its one thing if you have a godly older friend who can encourage and pray with you. But if you're only going to them to talk about this person, don't. Spending time talking about guys/girls is NOT going to help guard your heart at all! Go to God, your parents, or an older friend for advice and encouragement.

6) Avoid things that can pollute your thoughts.
-The wrong type of movies or tv shows.
-The wrong type of things on the internet.
-The wrong type of music.
-The wrong type of books or magazines.

When God asks for our hearts, he wants all of it. There must not be any open spots that leave place for the enemy to get in. A heart that is truly guarded will not have a hole that is waiting for "Mr. or Mrs. Right" to come. God wants to completely fill your heart, and once you are happy and satisfied with Him, then He will open that spot for "Mr. or Mrs. Right".

Assignment:
God doesn't look on the outside, he looks at our heart. The bible tells us about man different types of hearts that God is looking for. So get out your bible, and go look up these verses about the different types of hearts God wants us to have. Have a time of prayer and ask Him to help you have those kinds of a heart.

1 Kings 3:9 & 12
2 Chronicles 16:9
2 Chronicles 34:27
Psalm 7:10
Psalm 34:18
Psalm 51:10
Psalm 119:80
Proverbs 17:22
Matthew 5:8
Matthew 11:29
Ephesians 4:32
2 Timothy 2:22
James 4:8
1 Peter 1:22

I did use a few books when preparing for this, so you may read something that sounds familiar. Thanks so much for reading this, and I hope it has been somewhat of a help to you. Please feel free to leave comments with any thoughts, whether you agree or disagree, I'd still love to hear from you. And, yes...I do realize I said I'd only post once a week, but I never stick to those plans I make. I post whenever I feel I have something that God gave me to post. :-) Have a great Sunday!

*Some material is taken from "Before you meet Prince Charming" by Sarah Mally and "Just Friends" by Cary Schmidt and Mike Ray*

We Must First Be Satisfied With Him...

2009-07-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

Okay, so for a start I thought I'd share this with you. I did post this on my other blog a few months ago, but it seemed like a great start to this blog. Before we even talk about how things should be done with any type of guy/girl relationship, we first need to be completely in love with our Lord and Savior. Take some time to ask God to give you a strong relationship with him, and then trust him to guide you in your other relationships.

"Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone, to have a deep relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively.

But to His child, the Lord says: "No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled, and content with being loved by Me; with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me to have an intensely personal relationship with Me alone, discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found.

Only then will you be capable of the most perfect relationship that I have planned for you. "I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing… one that you cannot imagine.

"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6).

I want you to have the best. Please allow Me to bring it to you. "You just keep watching Me. Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am. Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you. Just waiting-that's all.

"Don't be anxious. Don't worry. Don't look around at all the things others have gotten or that I have given them. Don't look at all the things you think you want. Just keep looking up to Me.

"And then, when I know you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love far wonderful than any you would dream of. You see, I'm working at this moment to have you both ready at the same time. Until you are satisfied exclusively with Me, and the life I've given you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me.

"Dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love, I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty, perfection, and love that I offer you with myself. "Know that I love you utterly. Be satisfied in Me."

Under Construction...

2009-07-21T20:14:00.000-07:00

Sorry, this blog is still under construction. My hope is that it will be up and running within a month, so please check back again soon. Thanks!