Showing posts with label Ideas and Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ideas and Thoughts. Show all posts

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Guest Post: 7 Myths of Single Life

By Cary Schmidt

Seven Myths of Single-Life
Myths abound in today’s culture—through urban legends, chain emails, speed-diets, and beyond! Thanks to snopes.com, it’s pretty easy to run an email, a story, or a bizarre event through a quick research test to find out if it’s true or not.
So—do you have a “snopes” for life? Has it occurred to you that life also has its myths and “urban legends.” The issue is, these myths have much greater consequences. And much like “snopes” we need to take the philosophies, assumptions, and teachings of our pop-culture and run them through the truth test—the Bible.
Here are seven popular myths of single-life—seven lies that many singles buy into. Let’s run them through the truth test and unmask them as frauds:
1. Happiness and love is found in a person and I must find that person. Many people fall for this lie. Their lives become an endless search for the right person to completely bring happiness to life. The problem is—no human being can fulfill the deepest desires of our hearts. That is reserved for God alone, through Jesus Christ. Psalm 16:11 teaches, “Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy;”
2. Freedom is about making decisions alone and doing my own thing—”I gotta be me…” This is a gross distortion of a biblical truth. Yes, God created you as an individual with many unique qualities—so in that sense, you do have to be you. But, God never intended for you to live independent of Him or outside of His purpose or structure for life. The greatest life is found when you are who God truly made you to be. In John 10:10 Jesus said, ” I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”
3. There is a short-cut to success and fulfillment in life and I will find it. Many believe that there are quick ways to happiness and fulfillment in life, and so they fall for them—parties, illicit sex, drinking, drugs, etc. We all tend to want the path of least resistance and the quickest path to success. In truth, the best life is built one decision at a time on the strong foundation of biblical values and principle.
God taught in Joshua 1:8, that true success is a product of biblical principles in practice. Joshua 1:8″ This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.”
4. Responsibility and purpose in life can be indefinitely postponed. In the short term, a life free of responsibility and commitment seems like the way to go—but in the long term, it’s disastrous. We were designed by our Creator to have purpose, to embrace commitments, and to shoulder responsibilities that honor Him. God teaches that life comes with built in accountability and responsibility. Those who embrace this, always win. Romans 14:12, “So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.”
5. Love is a mystical, magical, fleeting thing that has something to do with sex. God is love and God created sex, so who could possibly instruct us in this matter better than Him. Quite simply, true love is a choice, not an emotion. You do it, you don’t feel it. Warm and fuzzy emotions, as enjoyable as they are, are not and never will be love. And sex is only an expression of love when it’s done God’s way—within a committed marriage for life. Outside of that boundary, sex is harmful in every way to both parties. It does irreparable spiritual harm.
Here’s how God says it: 1 Corinthians 6:18, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.”
6. As long as I’m not hurting anyone else, what I do doesn’t matter. This sounds great and becomes a great excuse for someone who purely lives for self. The problem is, it’s simply not true. No man is an island. We all influence somebody. We all have people in the future we will influence. And every decision you make today is countless repercussions for people around you and people in your future that you haven’t even met yet—like your kids! Think of it this way—have you become the bearer of some of your parents bad decisions? Probably so. And at the time, they too were thinking their decisions wouldn’t hurt anyone. But you know differently.
God commands us to live as examples to others, positively influencing them for right. 1 Timothy 4:12, “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”
7. Pleasure, possessions, and personal pursuits can ultimately fill the longing of my heart. God created pleasure. God gives us possessions. And God calls us to purposeful pursuits. But He is the source and the giver. When we forsake following God and pursue these other things, life begins to fall apart. Apart from God, More stuff merely means more problems! We’re called to worship God and use things. But so often we get it backwards. We worship things and use God.
1 Timothy 6:17, “Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;”
Are you falling for some of these myths? Begin today to align your life with God’s principles—beginning with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You can read more about having that relationship in another article in this magazine.
Build your life and future upon truth, not upon the myth and urban legends of popular philosophy. Opinions of men will fail, but God’s Word is always true!

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Myths abound in today’s culture—through urban legends, chain emails, speed-diets, and beyond! Thanks to snopes.com, it’s pretty easy to run an email, a story, or a bizarre event through a quick research test to find out if it’s true or not.

So—do you have a “snopes” for life? Has it occurred to you that life also has its myths and “urban legends.” The issue is, these myths have much greater consequences. And much like “snopes” we need to take the philosophies, assumptions, and teachings of our pop-culture and run them through the truth test—the Bible.

Here are seven popular myths of single-life—seven lies that many singles buy into. Let’s run them through the truth test and unmask them as frauds:

1. Happiness and love is found in a person, and I must find that person. Many people fall for this lie. Their lives become an endless search for the right person who will completely bring happiness to life. The problem is—no human being can fulfill the deepest desires of our hearts. That is reserved for God alone, through Jesus Christ. Psalm 16:11 teaches,“Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy;”

2. Freedom is about making decisions alone and doing my own thing—”I gotta be me…” This is a gross distortion of a biblical truth. Yes, God created you as an individual with many unique qualities—so in that sense, you do have to be you. But, God never intended for you to live independent of Him or outside of His purpose or structure for life. The greatest life is found when you are who God truly made you to be. In John 10:10 Jesus said, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”

3. There is a shortcut to success and fulfillment in life, and I will find it. Many believe there are quick ways to happiness and fulfillment in life, and so they fall for them—parties, illicit sex, drinking, drugs, etc. We all tend to want the path of least resistance and the quickest path to success. In truth, the best life is built patiently, one decision at a time, on the strong foundation of biblical values and principles. This takes years—not weeks or months.

God taught in Joshua 1:8 that true success is a product of biblical principles in practice: “This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.”

4. Responsibility and purpose in life can be indefinitely postponed. In the short term, a life free of responsibility and commitment seems like the way to go—but in the long term, it’sdisastrous. We were designed by our Creator to have purpose, to embrace commitments, and to shoulder responsibilities that honor Him. God teaches that life comes with built-in accountability and responsibility. Those who embrace this, always win. Romans 14:12, “So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.”

5. Love is a mystical, magical, fleeting thing that has something to do with sex. God is love, and God created sex, so who could possibly instruct us in this matter better than Him. Quite simply, true love is a choice, not an emotion. You do it, you don’t feel it. Warm and fuzzy emotions, as enjoyable as they are, are not and never will be love. And sex is only an expression of love when it’s done God’s way—within a committed marriage for life. Outside of that boundary, sex is harmful in every way to both parties. It does irreparable spiritual harm.

Here’s how God says it: 1 Corinthians 6:18, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.”

6. As long as I’m not hurting anyone else, what I do doesn’t matter. This sounds great and becomes an easy excuse for someone who purely lives for self. The problem is, it’s simply not true. No man is an island. We all influence somebody. We all have people in our future whom we will one day influence. And every decision you make today has countless repercussions in people’s lives for years to come—like your kids! Think of it this way—have you become the bearer of the bad decisions of others? Probably so. And at the time, they too were thinking their decisions wouldn’t hurt anyone. But you know differently.

God commands us to live as examples to others, positively influencing them for right. 1 Timothy 4:12, “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”

7. Pleasure, possessions, and personal pursuits can ultimately fill the longing of my heart. God created pleasure. God gives us possessions. And God calls us to purposeful pursuits. But He is the source and the giver. When we forsake following God and pursue these other things, life begins to fall apart. Apart from God, more stuff merely means more problems! We’re called to worship God and use things. But so often we get it backwards. We worship things and use God.

1 Timothy 6:17, “Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;”

Are you falling for some of these myths? Begin today aligning your life with God’s principles—beginning with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You can read more about starting that relationship by clicking here.

Build your life and future upon truth, not upon the myth and urban legends of popular philosophy. Opinions of men will fail, but God’s Word is always true!


Sunday, March 21, 2010

Does The Term Really Matter?

I was reading through "Boy Meets Girl" (by Joshua Harris) again today and God brought something to my mind.
Actually, God showed me something I've been doing wrong.
And kept thinking "No, I didn't do that! I just know I didn't do that!"

So I signed on blogger,
looked at some of my old posts on here...

And guess what?
I have been doing something wrong.
Boy, thats not a fun thing to admit.
Wanna know what it is?

Of course you do...

:)

Well, God showed me that when I talk about relationships, whether I'm posting on here or talking to a friend, I come off really hard and make it sound like Courtship (what I call courtship at least) is the only way thats right or that works.

But God brought it to mind that the term or what you call the relationship doesn't matter. What matters is whether God is the center of that relationship and if it is honoring to Him or not.

I know some people who call their relationship "Courtship" and it is not a God honoring relationship at all. And on the other hand, I know some people who call their relationship "Dating" and it is very God honoring and you can clearly see God through it.

So does the term really matter?

No.

I do still like the term courtship better then dating...but thats just what I like.
It sounds more old-fashion and romantic...but again thats just me. :)

Call your relationship (or future relationship) whatever you want...
Just keep God at the center of it.

Anyways, I guess I kind of just wanted to clear this up and apologize for the way I've sounded in some of my posts.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Can't Think Of A Good Title...

I've done a lot of thinking lately about this whole single and waiting on God thing. I've had some conversations about dating that have really had me asking myself why. Why don't I date? Why do I want to save my first kiss for my wedding day? Why am I staying single when there are plenty of guys that I could date? Why do I sit and watch my friends date guy after guy while I've never dated anyone? Why do I keep myself emotionally and psychically pure for one guy?

It makes me wonder...what is your reason for waiting? Is it just because your parents don't want you to date? Are you just trying to save yourself from the hurt that comes with dating and heartbreak? Or is it because you want to honor your future spouse and glorify God? It is good to obey your parents, and its even a wise choice to save yourself from the pain of dating and heartbreak...but the number one reason should be because its what God wants and it honors your future spouse.

This staying single and waiting for one person isn't considered normal or good in the world. In fact, if you've never dated or now choose not to, then people think there is something wrong with you. The "normal" 19 year old girl is either obsessing over the guy shes currently 'in like' with or crying over the last guy that broke her heart. I mean, you are just plain weird if you make it to almost 20 years old and have never even been on a date or kissed a guy. lol

I think that is hard for me sometimes. Loneliness is a hard part of waiting, but hearing what people say about you is also really hard. It's only by the grace of God that Christian young people are about to remain pure and wait for the one God made for them. And you should all be proud of yourselves and of God working through you. Your future spouses will be so proud of you for waiting for them.

I'm so very thankful that God has given me the strength to remain pure and wait for Him to bring my husband to me. And thank about it...what a gift that will be for our future spouses!!

Okay, so I'm not sure what the point of this post is. I just had all these little thoughts in my head and figured I should get them out of there. LOL! Hope it wasn't to confusing for ya! :)

Sunday, January 24, 2010

"The Single Gift"

"The Single Gift"

How blessed you are, you single one,
Don't talk of care and woes.
You've got too much to be thankful for,
Oh what, you'd like to know.

It's no mistake, no misdirection
Of God's perfect plan
That you've not found your special lady
Or you, that certain man.

God loves you so and has much more
To give then you've ever received.
That He's giving His best to you right now,
You really must believe.

His best is Himself, do you have it in full
Or only a bit on the side?
No man can meet your needs like God,
Nor can a lovely bride.

If your life's not complete, you know that Jesus is
And your life He will fill
If you'll only put Him first each day
And live to do His will.

He's gifted you for undistracted
Devotion to the Lord.
There should be nothing that can interfere
With Him and prayer and the Word.

Unless you let down the guard of your heart
And let others take His place,
Then you'll lack joy and peace and hope
And not experience His grace.

So give your heart right back to God,
Let Him keep it safe for you.
And when it's better then His best,
He'll make your one into two.

~Donna L. Mihura ~

I like this poem so much that I'm posting it on both of my blog! : ) It is really sweet and very encouraging!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Chaperon . . . Yes or No?

I'm planning on taking a break from the modesty posts for a while. I'm just not quite sure what I want to do next and I don't want to post until I have clear leading on it. But don't worry, we'll get back to it. : )

Now, back to our title . . . What is your opinion on chaperoning? Let me tell you what I believe and then you can do the same if you' like. : ) First off, a double date is NOT chaperoned. And when I say 'date' in this post, I do mean time you spend together while courting (whether its an evening out or in). I am not taking about 'dating' like the world uses it. But a lot of people will consider a double date as a chaperoned date. Well, it isn't. The dictionary defines 'Chaperon' as "An older person who for propriety accompanies young unmarried people." So you going out with another young courting couple really isn't a chaperoned date. But I believe it is fine for a young courting couple to go out with a married couple. It will give you a chance to ask them about marriage and their relationship, and will help you as a couple. Also, I don't believe its right for a younger sibling to chaperon. An older sibling may be fine for somethings, but when it comes to wanting to go out for a more formal type date, I think going with a married couple would be best. Now, I'm not saying it has to be your parents. In all honesty, I think it would be hard to relax if it was always with my parents, but I can think of several married couples in our church that I would love to have chaperon for my future husband and I some day.

Okay, so I went on for a but there, but it is in no way the longest post I've done. lol : ) So what are your thoughts on Chaperoning? Yes or No?



Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Meeting The Right Guy/Girl...

I was reading over some of the resources I have on relationships and came across the articles on Momof9splace.com. I have them on the side bar, so y'all can take a look at those if you want. But this is part of the 4th paper. We always talk about trusting God and going with the idea of courting rather then dating...but I think we all wonder how that will happen. I have done a post on the process of courting before, but have you ever wondered what we can to meet a guy or girl? Yes we do need to trust God, but I believe God wants us to do our part too. This is just a few things to help us out a bit. : )

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

1. Pray and submit yourself to God. Over 80% of all young women want to be married and have a family. You are probably part of the 80%. God wants most young men and women to be married and have a family. Therefore, pray about it. Submit yourself to God and His Word, seek His counsel and pray for Him to lead you to that special one. Then rest in His wisdom and mercy by faith.

2. Widen your circle of opportunities. Be faithful to the services of your home church, but go to as many camp meetings, youth camps, mission trips, and Gospel meetings as you can, not only for their spiritual benefit, but to meet other Christian young people. We have had a number of young couples meet at such places in the last few years. Moreover, God can bring young people of similar interests and backgrounds together at such places. We have had one couple meet on a mission trip to Mexico, several at camp meetings and one at a young adult fellowship.

3. Accept introductions. If some sincere brother or sister in the Lord says to you, "There is someone I would like you to meet," unless it is something other than awkwardness, shyness or embarrassment, accept the invitation. We have had numbers of young couples meet that way. It works! Seek introductions. If there is someone you want to meet, seek an introduction through a third party. It is discreet, polite and effective.

4. Secure the blessings of the parents. Your parents have first and final approval on all the people you are likely to be romantically involved with. Talk it over with them before you get involved. Seek their counsel, approval and blessing. The young man should introduce the young lady to his parents. If further progress is made, the parents should meet and get acquainted.

5. Seek your pastor's advice. Before you get too serious, seek your pastor's advice. Pastors often know things even parents do not know. Moreover, most couples seek premarital counseling after the wedding arrangements are already made. It is often too late. I speak from sad experience.


Tuesday, September 22, 2009

A Lot On My Heart...

Well, I guess I don't really have a topic for this post. But I do have a LOT on my heart and I just thought I'd go ahead and share it with y'all. Hopefully y'all can make sense of it. I normally would put a post like this on my other blog, but it fits more with what we've been talking about on here. Sharon did give me a great idea to do some posts on modesty and such. I plan to do that soon, but I'm waiting for a book before I start. I think modesty does indeed have a HUGE impact on guy/girl relationships...but we'll get into that another time. : )

You know, as much as I wholeheartedly believe that the right way to go about a relationship is to fully wait on God, I still have times when I get rather discouraged and find the waiting even harder then normal. I see the teenagers around me pairing off and here's Katie...still waiting. I'm sure most of it is just a lack of faith, but that doesn't make it any easier. I have heard a lot of stories about how people of struggled with this and as soon as they've given the whole thing to God, they started to see God work in that area. Part of me says I already gave all that up, but another part of me knows that if I have really given it all to God then I shouldn't be struggling so much. I know I've still got some things to work on, but I pray that God helps me do that very soon. : )

I got a book for my birthday from a very dear little friend called 'The Princess and the kiss'. It's a children's book, but it has a very powerful truth in it. It's a fairy tale about a princess and how she saves her first kiss for the right person and right time. It was very cute, but also really encouraging. God has used a lot of little things like that to encourage me lately. Also, I'm thinking about starting a journal of letters for my future husband. I love to write, and I think maybe it might help me to write my thought about this time of waiting down for my future spouse to one day read. I'm not sure yet. Have any of you ever written letters to your future spouse? I'd like to hear your thoughts on it if you have. : )

I hope you don't mind my rambling for a minute...I'll be sure to get back to some 'normal' posts soon. : )

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Not Quite Sure Yet...

Sorry it's been so long since I've really posted much...I'm just not sure what to talk about next. I have had a few thoughts, but just haven't had peace about them. I'm kind of just wanting for God to give me inspiration on whats next...or peace on one of the ideas I've already had. So if y'all have any thoughts or ideas of what you'd like to read about next, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE feel free to leave a comment. This is y'all's blog too...so you tell me what you'd like to read and learn about and I'll certainly pray about it.

Some Peaceful Music...


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